Hello again mortals who dwell on these haunted Islands! Last month I told you how to get a Japanese Girlfriend through japanese gadgets. This month for Halloween we are doing something a bit more spooky! Zombies are out there.. and if they aren’t there yet.. 2020 isn’t over yet! So the chance we have to deal with this is pretty real! How do we survive but keep our geeky image intact either fictional or non fictional ?! Like last time I searched Japan TrendShop for the best geeky gadget to deal with the situation.
*This time I provided a link to the gadgets/items on Japan Trend store! If you want to check out more simply click on the pictures! I am not sponsored! I just want you all to survive the zombies….seriously I am not sponsored I just like doing this!*
Scavenging and Tinkering
The Walmart, that Piggly Wiggly or that other super store you are used to.. those will be the things that first get attacked by the zombies. If movies have taught us anything it is that zombies REALLY seem to like shopping. Especially in big malls! You will have to scavenge. Your electrician..well he just got ate! The plumber.. managed to make it to your house.. but then he tried to eat your brain. In the new world you will have to scavenge build and loot! Luckily there are plenty of gadgets for us out there! To keep our geek image up! So make sure you order these before all hell breaks loose.
You will probably have to get a wire cutter to cut trough some fences in your way trough the devastated world…but normal wire cutters make you look like such a huge “Basic Normie”. You don’t want that! The internet will be gone! There are some pockets of electric grid left.. but crunchyroll.. that is inaccessible to us! So how do we tell the world that anime is great?! Well through our tools! Evangelion apparently is very good at giving us tools and no I don’t mean Shinji Ikari. I mean Hardware.. tools that go in a toolbox! So of course there is a Evangalian themed toolbox as well.. In fact there are three! Eva 0 Eva 1 and Eva 2 are all design options for all of these tools! The purple one however is most visible! THe orange one might bland to much with the glow of fire reflecting on the broken concrete and the red one might make it hard to stand out in the pools of blood of a thousand eaten innocents. So be smart and stick with the EVA 1 tools. The toolbox cost €101 or $118
.For about 26 euros more you can get an Evangelion Screwdriver to go with it. However you need to multiply that by three since EVA 0, EVA 1 and EVA 2 all have different shapes and sizes. Eva 0 being the flathead of the bunch is the most important but Eva 2’s Tiny phillips head might be nifty as well and even EVA 1’s tool is neat! At worst you can jam them through a Zombie skull! So there is plenty of reason to invest in getting all three! add €78 or $90 dollar to your survival budget. A plastic/wire cutter is the next tool you need! Boobytrap creation is the way to survive after all! The snipping tool has the Evangelion logo and once again comes in three colours.. but this time they are the same. The purple one you find quicker on the floor and the yellow one is most noticeable inside your toolbox! So pick your poison! Do not buy them all as a single snipper will set you back €62 or $72 dollars.Pliers almost have the same design and cost about the same..but well you need pliers to pull all that debris out of your legs and bullets of raiders out of your shoulder. Finally we have a tape measure. All versions come at 5.5 meters so pick your favourite again. €27 or $32 dollars and this key tool to survival is yours.
The cost of Survival So Far: €331 or $386
Zombies for some reason also seem to love the big roads. We see very few people drive around in Zombie movies unless they have armored vehicles. With all the cars crashing on the streets you will have to drive slow and with normal windows you are prey! NO! You are going to have to do things by foot! That means you will need to carry a lot of stuff. Create yourself an utility belt! But with basic carabiners attached to it you kinda look like those wanna be camping dads, who never really camped out.. but thinks he looks cool by having a bear maze carbined to his belt and all other sorts of tools! No we don’t want to be that! We want to be geeks!
So why would you buy a regular carabiner when you can buy a Totoro one. This Carabiner is made by Ghibli’s merchandise studio themselves so that means that even if you buy it before the apocalypse begins you are not supporting some dudebro who uses his tool money to become an even bigger tool in real life! With this you support the geek community. The carabiner comes in two colours Silver and Green and can carry weights up to 26 kilogram. Let’s say you will need about six Carabiners, 3 silver ones and 3 green ones. Since we don’t want one colour to feel less beloved.. that will run you about €222 euros since they cost €36 euro a piece. Americans can get this for $43 dollars or $258 dollars for the recommended amount.
Total cost for Survival so Far: €553 or $644
Muscle Suit Every Wearable Exoskeleton Tight Fit
The final gadget deals mostly with looting and hunting for supplies! If you are physically weak you will have to make multiple trips to get all those canned goods from that camp you looted…after doing what needs to be done… to your safehouse. The more trips you make.. the more likely you are to die in this zombie apocalypse. So you will want to carry as much as possible. The Japanese apparently found strength an issue for stuff like regular groceries and decided to create a strength enhancing suit for commercial use. So if it can help you pick up groceries it can help you pick up scavenged materials right?! This suit is designed to strengthen your back allowing people to pick up items much easier by using an airflow of sorts! I have no idea how it works but apparently it does! Air is pretty amazing!
The suit comes in two variations: a soft fit and a tight fit. The soft fit is better for the people who deviate from Japanese dimensions but the tight fit models allow for more serious muscle power. It is said that the suit will help you with farmwork like tasks.. and pulling turnips out of the ground is something we might need to do to survive zombies. It can help you with carrying people and I am sure I don’t need to tell how likely that is in the zombie apocalypse! As a bonus there is an exoskeleton around you, that will work as some fairly specific armor.. but hey if it prevents you from a single bite it might save your life still.. unless you are bitter anywhere else. Still the suit requires no training, no batteries and it only weighs 3.8 kilograms so you can hang it on one of your Carabiners easily if you are not using it… this one is a big investment though! But for €2455 or $2868 dollars you have a suit that can..slightly..increase your strength! Every extra tin of beans you can carry is another day of survival here!
Total cost of survival so far: €3008 or $3512
So now that we have discussed the way we can obtain stuff and build a better world for ourselves let’s take a look at how to keep ourselves safe. How do we protect ourselves? Personally I would build a huge suit of plushies and like a beautiful Katamari I would just roll everywhere I need to go. If zombies can’t get into my suit to bite me I am safe and zombies are dumb. Now not everyone has as many plushies at me so let’s take a look at some safety gear.
Kamiyoroi Cardboard Samurai Armor
For this spot I almost considered a complete Batman decorative Samurai armor that sets you back more than €5000 but it came with some big problems. Metal armor slows you down, it is very heavy so you lose lifting power and we do not know how fragile this decorative armor is. So I looked for a better option and then I found this Samurai Cardboard armor. For just €88,- or $103 you can have armor with which you can look like a samurai sponsored by BIC. If you don’t like the colour of cardboard however you can paint it in every colour you like! Paint camouflage on it.. or Goku’s Gi! Maybe something of Demon Slayer to represent! Draw your HighSchool of the Dead Waifu on it so she can always come with you! The options are plenty! The set can be given a size you want so if you fit in a tight fit exoskeleton you can adapt this to fit OVER it. Sugoi!
Now Cardboard might not be the best armor but Zombies usually just scratch or bite with all the ornaments you get with it. You can design a pretty good bite proof armor yourself. You can even glue stuff on it that you find! It’s thick paper after all. Put some nails trough it from your side to give yourself some spikey protection, Superglue a flashlight to it to give it a gadget. Cardboard armor provides plenty of solutions and if it weighs you down in a chase you can just destroy it to move faster. It is a a very tactically sound option! …as long as it doesn’t rain outside or if you need to cross a body of water. If you bleed too much you will also destroy it or if zombies bleed on it too much.. but that will teach you to stay indoors, and keep your distance from the zombies! It’s just cardboard.. it will protect you but never make you overconfident! A must buy! Samurai also look cool!
Total Cost of Survival €3096 or $3615
Derup Cap Collapsible Safety Helmet
Unfortunately I did not find a Cardboard Samurai helmet to go with it.. but I am not sure it would be a good idea. For everyone who ever wore a cosplay helmet that protects the ears knows that it sucks to only be able to hear what is in front of you! This goes ever more so in a Zombie apocalypse. You are the one with the working brain so you really want to anticipate both visual and audio cues. So I looked for a helmet that doesn’t cover your ears. As armor for your neck you can wear one of those japanese neck cooling fans.. or just a fluffy neck pillow! Even a series of scarfs would be good. Something you have at home. However you still need a helmet from all the falling debris from when all buildings became structurally unsafe because of the zombie fighting. You can dive into a lower area head first to dodge zombies and do other helmet stuff. I am sure it will give you some higher Armor Class somehow.
Foldable helmets are very popular in Japan because of the many earthquakes and putting away full sized helmets for the entire family is a hassle. If I know my survival games I also know inventory space is pretty limited so everything that can save you inventory space will be an amazing blessing. This helmet is stated to be a disaster helmet and I am pretty sure that the Zombie Apocalypse counts as a disaster so it is bound to be good for that. For €69 euro or $81 us Dollars you can keep your head safe and give it a nice drill shape! I love drills in anime!
Total Cost of Survival €3165 or $3696
Sanwa Home Privacy Tent
Zombies are dumb creatures, they usually only attack a fleshy mammal when they can see one. Hiding in a tent, a freezer, a cabinet or whatever oftenly is enough as long as they can’t see you. With glass..they suddenly become able to open doors, break glass with tools or just punch at it until everything breaks but out of sight out of mind. So why not carry a little black box with you that obscures you from sight.It fold away in a very tiny space, and only requires one touch assembly meaning that within a couple of seconds.. like 30 or less you can have this room set up! 30 seconds hiding spots are invaluable while running around the devastated planet earth. Just make sure to not make the zombies spot you through the optional window.. point that to a wall if possible or cover it up with some cloth! Again it requires no storage space and can be hooked to one of your Carabiners at all times. You can even sort of use it as a shield if absolutely necessary.
Right now Japanese people use these to build a small officer in their home to have some privacy for work away from their partner. While I do not really have claustrophobia I do think I would feel very locked up for what is basically a €118 escape pass to having to “say” honey please please leave me alone. One could work from the bedroom and one from the living.. but hey I live in a studio right now so maybe for people who live a bit like that or require a Wifi cable. Still a privacy tent isn’t seen nearly as useful as a pocket zombie shelter. I would test this by putting someone in it during Black Friday.. but with the 5 foot rule I am not sure we will have a Black Friday this year. So results on success are still pending. As a self proclaimed Zombie expert I think it will work but don’t come haunt me if you die! If you buy it at least it well help you with people screen cheating at LAN parties!
Total cost of survival €3283 or $3834
Keeping your Sanity
Everything you once loved is gone…most likely.. if it’s not gone yet it will be gone soon! Rarely do you see more than one family member survive nor does a pre-established group of friends survive… if any zombie movie EVER is to be believed you will be relying on strangers who will become your friends for life… which usually ends at the end of a movie. There aren’t that many success stories! Post infestation life will suck and it will eat at your mind so purchase these two gadgets to keep your sanity!
This seemed like a bit of a silly gadget to me at first. In normal life I also can’t really believe it is a very relevant gadget. How stinky can shoes that you need a device to clean them.. why would you not just get new ones?! I mean the gadget is easily 10 pairs of cheapish shoes/on sale shoes. It will take a long time before those go stink to the point of no return. Seriously! It also is an overnight process ..so it’s not like you can suddenly realise.. ooh these shoes don’t smell good let me device them for a minute and they are fresh again. So this is one of these non issue gadgets to me. that I find looking very funny! €351 or $410 is what you would pay to get this non issue resolved. I never really smelled anyone’s shoes unless I am really close. 99.9% of the time I do not live on the floor and if people have those foul smelling shoes I hope they toss them before their stench reaches sitting height.
But okay in Japan shoes are off a lot more and standing at strangers places a lot more so I kinda get it.. still pretty useless but for a zombie Apocalypse this is a tool that you will NEED! Let’s be honest at best you can take 1 or 2 pairs of shoes with you and since you have to scavenge a lot.. you will be doing a lot of walking on them. You will often sleep in very small spaces so I can imagine you getting nightmares if the place smells too much of dead cows. There are strangers with you most likely so if they are too bothered by you they might just “not save” you and your stinky shoes! So this will definitely keep your sanity up a bit!
One pair of shoes means it needs to be cleaned and hydrated regularly. You could still go loot a shoe store but that comes with risk as we already established zombies like to hang in malls and shopping areas. Keep your sanity and smell fresh!
PS. I would defiantly wear those quasi heels during the apocalypse, I like the colour as well!
Total cost of Survival €3634 or $4244
Sitting Atom Astro Boy Communication Robot
Your friends are dead, your family is dead, you had to eat your pet and the two survivors you hang out with only talk about sports or even worse Fortnite and/or Roblox. You have no one to talk to! Even if you make a friend they soon get eaten by zombies again. There is that one fellow that killed himself driven crazy by the scent of his own shoes! Poor guy never read Pinkie’s blog.. he was doomed from the get go. You sure as heck aren’t able to communicate with those who are still left and you kind of mistrust them. You’ve seen them eye your fabulous cardboard armor. Everyone needs someone to talk to and if that conversation is introducing yourself every time and you never make progress socially that does not feel good either. “Hi I am Pinkie I survived the great burning zombie Tornado of 2022’ is a nice story to tell but if the people who keep hearing it die it becomes less fun really quickly! So you need someone who can talk to you and remember what you tell them! A buddy! A robot friend!
Sitting Atom Astro Boy is basically a REALLY advanced Furby! Who over time learns to converse with you, remembers what you told him and reflects back to that. “Remember the time we survived the Zombie Tornado of 2022 Pinkie” he could say.. and I”d be like “Boy do I?!” “It was bad-ass” . Happy that someone remembers my adventures and being able to recognise 12 faces and voices to bond with Astro Boy can be the councilor of your camp! He doesn’t need food, he will not die! He will sing and dance for you (while sitting) he will introduce himself every time with a gesture and he only needs to be hooked up to the power grid to function! No hoarding for batteries either. However you get power doesn’t matter Astro Boy takes it! You might need an app to connect to him so you better get him fast before the internet goes offline! He costs €2457 or $2870’s which seems like a lot but for a lifetime of therapy and an undying friend during an apocalypse it is nothing of course. After all, your money will be worthless soon anyway! I mean what else are you going to talk to?! A volleyball?! Man sports goods are such normie stuff. This one might even motivate you to study Japanese! Take that Wilson!
Final cost of survival: €6091 or $7114
Note: This blog is made for entertainment purposes. Pinkie and her staff in no way claim these items would offer actual protection against a Zombie Apocalypse.. they MIGHT come in handy but we do not guarantee your safety or actually suggest you buy these in preparation for such an event. Pinkie does not ACTUALLY think the Zombie Apocalypse is approaching…however should you really lack the brain capacity to recognise this is not for real……. “Onegai! Tasukete! .. Please help me! I do not have the money for the complete kit! Please help me out by supporting my Ko-Fi! I don’t want to be Zombie Food”