Tag: Paradise

Periwinkle: Legend of the Purple Plunderer or something like that.

POSTCARDS FROM PARADISE

My eyes shot open.

I hear gravel cracking under tires outside my hut. I look at my alarm clock. Three thirty in the morning. I see the red glow of brake lights through my window shades. I hear a car door open up.

*Quack Quack* *Quack Quack*

I know whose Jeep this is. Only one person on this island drives a custom Duck Jeep. Complete with matching Duck Quacks as a keys-still-in-the-ignition-alarm.

I hear another door slam. Then palmate up the drive. I dress quickly. What could it be this late at night? Was it something I had done? Something I had said?

*Knock Knock* Two raps at the door.

Cookie sighs, rolling over on the couch trying to catch some ZzZz’s. Some Gaurd Seal he is.

I open the door somewhat guessing what this late night meeting could be about.

“Princess?

Princess Pinkie hands me a shovel and strolls back to the jeep. I examine the shovel and she turns around at the Duck Jeep. “Well? Are you ready?”

Not soon after we’re driving through the sandy roads of Paradise in the dead of night. We pass by occasional bonfires and coconuts enjoying their night. I, blink twice as I see Sunny hanging upside down from a tree. I, shake my head. I have to lay off the drink.

“So if this is about..” I start

“It’s not about anything. Granted you haven’t been showing up for your duties but Paradise is accommodating. The only reason I’m calling upon you now is because I may have found something that would interest you.”

With my interest peaked I gaze over towards the driver side as Princess Pinkie holds up what looks like a dirty old map. She keeps her eyes on the road ahead as I take the map from her hands.

“What is it?”

“I think it’s a treasure map.”

“Here? Treasure? On the island??”

“If that map is true. We should be approaching the spot soon” As we pull up to a secluded beach across the island. The sun not yet risen painting the sky a lighter shade of blue. We exit the vehicle and see that there is already a red “X” painted on the sand. We look at one another and shrug. I throw the shovel into the sand and only have to scoop one shovelful of sand up to uncover what lies beneath. It is a copy of the PlayStation 2 game, Pirates: Legend of the Black Buccaneer…

We both look at it on the ground. “Do you think that’s it?” I ask. Pinkie seems just as disappointed. “I mean.. shit. I don’t know.”

“I’ll try digging a little further”

“Yeah do that” she says as I scoop Pirates out of the way and continue digging.

The nine o’ clock sun is beating down on both of us collapsed on the beach. Hours of digging. No dice. The treasure is unfortunately the PlayStation 2 game, Pirates: Legend of the Black Buccaneer. Defeated we both rise and walk over to the Jeep. Arriving at my hut only a short time later Pinkie tosses the game on the seat after I get out.

“Maybe you were meant to play this game.”

Looking down at it. “Yeah…sure.”

I close the door.

So this game arguably has the longest trailer I have ever seen. Especially considering the average completion time on Howlongtobeat.com is around four hours. Which four hours really doesn’t seem like a long period of time. It’s only 1/6th of a day. 1/2 of a good night’s sleep (does anyone ever get a full eight?) no, four hours doesn’t seem long at all.

BUT THIS FOUR HOURS IS A VERY LONG TIME

So.. arguably part of this is my fault but mostly it’s not. Let me explain.

Back some time ago in my early 20’s I used to work at a Gas Station/Pizzeria type place. I don’t know how most of Europe works but I’m pretty sure you guys have the same idea – in Dublin I ate at some Irish McDonald’s knock off that was way better at a Petrol station. So people liked the pizza at this place and every summer – it was right down the road from where they held the county fair.

Now this county fair is a big deal. Every year. People really dig it and every year it’d usually be the same touring carnival staff that really dug our food. So working there while the fair was operating afforded you the chance to meet a lot of colorful personalities. But there was one particular person I’ll never forget because there was a part of me that envied him. I think.

This was at the height of the Pirates of the Caribbean craze and there was a man that would adorn himself in full Jack Sparrow attire and make up and well… he was quite a hit. Twenty year old me would watch as people surrounded him for photos as I pushed out pizza dough or made subs. Watching quietly from afar thinking things like:

“Wow… that guy probably gets a lot of tail.”

And

“Pirates of the Caribbean was the best thing that’s ever happened to this dude.”

What the hell does this have to do with anything? Well… it does sort of help explain my misconceptions of pirates and piracy in general. I, a relatively unpopular and lowly pizza boy saw this Johnny Depp look-a-like crushing it. And I should add a fun loving and mischievous, Jack Sparrow cosplayer that was melting the hearts of moms the world over while everyone else swooned.

As I sat there changing our fryer baskets I glared at the local star. As people gathered around I thought to myself:

“Probably never sailed a day in your life, you fraud!”

But neither had I AND there is absolutely no sailing going on in the deceptively titled, Pirates: Legend of the Black Buccaneer.

In fact, if you missed the five minute video at the beginning of the game you probably would have no clue this is a game based on pirates at all. There is no sailing, or drinking rum or singing songs. All you do is shoot monkeys in the face and fall to your death.

The story’s premise is sort of cool, if not a bit confusing. During the height of the slave trade – there was a slave ship on its way to a Spanish Outpost that found itself ravaged in the storms of the Bermuda Triangle. Where as legend will have it the legendary slave, La Borgne commanded a slave army that waged war on the nearby Spanish Outpost. They destroyed all that was in their way because well.. they were understandably pissed off. The Outpost was deserted and in nautical lore the island was considered cursed and dangerous but also of course, a terminal for lost treasures and riches beyond your wildest dreams.

At last, hearing nothing from the outpost for quite a while the Spanish Crown sends its most decorated captain out to learn the fate of the doomed ship. The revered explorer, Dominic Roberto De La Cruz (shout out to my friend, Filipa 🤗) As legend would have it De La Cruz would land on the island and battle La Borgne and her army of slaves but the outcome of this struggle is lost to the sands of time and De La Cruz was never heard from again.

Here is where you enter – as Francis Blade. A nobody rogue who finds himself as the sole survivor of a ship wreck marooned on La Borgne Island. It is here where apes and orangutans attack you for no reason whatsoever and you’ll spend hours upon hours swearing at your television as the game’s inconsistent and slippery controls fail you over and over again.

IGN.com

There is an interesting element (one that I don’t like and I don’t really think it makes a ton of sense) but after a little bit of gameplay you come across an Amulet. An amulet that gives you the power to morph into the “Black Buccaneer”. Whom confusingly looks like a mix between Baron Samedi and the Hulk. The artwork on the old screens are very heavy with the Baron Samedi aesthetic as well without any real mention of Haiti or Voodoo culture whatsoever.

One could argue that it’s not necessarily the developer and writer’s jobs to spoon feed the gamer every single detail but it sort of seems like a missed opportunity when you’re dealing with subject matter as fascinating as Baron Samedi and Haitian culture as a whole.

I like the idea of an escaped slave raging against her colonial captors through the use of brute force and black magic but why not run with it? It feels like a decent idea that was never fully realized. Which is basically the entire story of this game.

If they would have just tightened up the controls and upped the story a little bit you could have had a memorable adventure but instead they ended up with confusing plot accompanied by infuriating controls.

SHOP TIL YOU DROP

I mean .. yeah .. it’s bad but it’s still worth more than one cent. Buy it if you see it for one cent.

DESERT ISLAND SONGS

I mean will any other song written about a pirate ever compare?

PERIWINKLE’S LOW HANGING FRUIT PUNCH VERSION 2.0

1.) Vin Diesel Skull Cap

2.) Shameless Voodoo Face Paint

Paradise Hill: Origins

POSTCARDS FROM PARADISE HILL

… I never really understood how I got there until long after I was already apart of the town. The last thing I remember is seeing Cookie walk into a fog. I followed in after him wondering where he was off to. He seemed quiet and more focused than usual. Eventually the fog grew so thick I could barely see directly in front of me. I called out for Cookie to no response.

It felt like I had been walking for days. Eventually the sand of the beach turned into asphalt and I began following the lonely white road line to keep some sense of direction. It felt as though I was traveling in dream years. So quickly through time that it gave the illusion of time itself standing still. When all at once the silhouette of a sign jutted out through the mist.

“WELCOME TO PARADISE HILL”

That was a few weeks ago I believe. But it could have been years ago. Time is a concept very rarely regarded in Paradise Hill. Besides, I had bigger fish to fry. I stood with the letter in my hand. I couldn’t believe it. The letter read:

“NOTICE OF EVICTION”

I stood shocked. I had fallen in love with the town. No traffic, no lines, no one to bother me. The fog made certain things and people a bit harder to see but really, once you got used to squinting all the time it was quite the destination. It had all of the makings and charm of your typical north west lumber town.

Nurses between shifts walking down the road together. I seem to see the same group every day after I wake up, hop out of bed and take a shower in Paradise Motel. “Hi ladies! Working hard or hardly working?” They always seem to get a kick out of it.

When I did leave the motel room in it was in short bursts. Run to the corner store and pick up a six pack – stop at the diner and use the kitchen to cook up a couple of steaks and then stroll merrily back through the blurry black and white white fog to my hotel room. Occasionally outside some loud fire siren would go off and it’d start to get dark outside but i never seemed to have an issue with it.

Just like anywhere else – you keep to yourself and no one tends to bother you. Not even in Paradise Hill. Until now.

As I read the eviction notice the board of directors at Paradise Hills sited a few reasons for my cause of eviction:

1.) LACK OF LODGING EXPENSES PAID: It’s true. I wasn’t paying rent. I mean no one ever asked. One time some guy with a huge hat knocked on the door and just sort of stood there and walked off. But I didn’t know if he was the landlord or just a creeper.

2.) THEFT OF GOODS AND SERVICES:

– (5) Welcome to Paradise Hill gift shop shirts

– (16) Six packs of Paradise Hill Ale

– (2) Bottles of sexual lubricant

– (1) Copy of The Titanic

– (1) Copy of Silent Hill: Origins

3.) FAILURE TO FACE YOUR OWN INNER DEMONS/ BE CREEPED OUT

Mr Winkle. Please – keep the goods you have procured and please leave town immediately. You are no longer welcome here at majestic Paradise Hill. Also your Sea Lion has been returned to your home safely. Please do not speak to any one on your way out as you have been creeping out the other residents for quite some time now.

Sincerely,

PARADISE HILL TOWN HALL

I packed up all my belongings as some beautiful sad music began playing from no where and I backpacked out of town. As I was on the outskirts of town I heard cheers of celebration. But before long I saw the bright lights and sights of Paradise again. Like a tilt-a-whirl through the dark. As I walked through the crowd no one seemed to notice me.

It dawned on me that I was now trapped in Paradise Hill forever. I was free to travel across the globe but no one would ever see me again. Only maybe being able to detect my presence here and there like that one movie with Sean Bean in it.

Baddest Bean on the planet.

Which I was completely fine with. I began to think of the possibilities of my new invisible life. I could sneak into Area 51 and finally figure out what the hell that place was all about. I could get into concerts for free. I could haunt people! This was going to be great. But my first mark was a hot dog stand I saw off the path near the coconut’s huts. I grabbed a roll and reached in the hot water and grabbed a hot dog. I slapped it into the bun and took a bite. Ah. Delicious hot dog stand hot dogs. Disgusting and delicious and now free for the rest of m-

“You gonna pay for that?”

Turns out I wasn’t invisible. And I wasn’t getting free hot dogs for the rest of my life. I walked home.

FANCY INTRO VIDEO

Released: March 4 2008

Developer: Climax Action (Sudeki, The Italian Job)

Published: Konami

Well back to reality and really sad gaming. Today, we have a case of a game that might have been alright if it wasn’t associated with such a strong franchise. I also sort of wanted to use this opportunity to explain what little work that does actually go into these posts and the sad consequences that result from playing (generally) nothing but bad games all of the time.

Not pictured: The Cry Hole that I crawl into after hours of bad gaming.
Shelves of despair

When Pinkie and I had a check in conversation (now that she has a palace built it’s become a whole event with feasts and festivities etc) she asked what I was working on. I told her I was planning on starting Silent Hill: Origins. She responded with, “isn’t that the really bad one?”

Which surprisingly it’s not the really bad one. It’s just not a really good one. Which sums up this game perfectly. If it were named anything else it would probably be considered a forgotten but slightly above average survival horror game – starts off kind of lame, picks up and ends in an absolutely nonsensical way. Put the words Silent Hill on the case however and now you’re looking at a lackluster experience.

In the game you start off as rootin’ tootin’ truck driver, Travis Grady. He’s driving his MAC Truck getting his kicks off Route 66 and all that when he spots a little girl in the road. He swerves to avoid her (as most human beings tend to do) and stops to get out and investigate the scene. Looking for the lost child, he sees her approaching from behind him in his rear view mirror only to disappear which scares the shit out of him but certainly doesn’t deter him from abandoning his vehicle and walking miles and miles in a thick fog in the middle of the road.

Eventually this leads Travis to a house fire. He spots some weird broad hanging out by the burning house and runs in because of course he does. And he rescues some kid that’s torched like a marshmallow. Eventually passing out – he awakes in Silent Hill to go search for the french fry kid and madness ensues.

Now, if I may – first off – I am a Daughter Daddy. She is the light of my life. When my wife was pregnant I think I surprised her by crossing my fingers and hoping for a daughter and we were lucky enough to get a bright, beautiful, healthy little lady. I fucking love that kid. BUT – I have watched enough scary movies to know that if I’m out in the middle of no where and some creepy little girl is hanging around – I’M NOT FOLLOWING HER. I DON’T CARE. GO AWAY. LEAVE ME ALONE.

Alright, with that out of the way lets cover a couple of things that this game does really nicely. The sound effects and soundtrack are top notch – Silent Hill quality. Like all other SH soundtracks, composed by the master, Akira Yamaoka. The absolute badass Thom Yorke-esque dark genius of video game soundtracks. The sound effects and music are unnerving and uncomfortable – aptly suited for the atmosphere.

I want to recommend this game so much more but it breaks my own personal cardinal sin of gaming: difficulty due to controls. There is nothing I hate more than fighting a game more than the story or gameplay itself.

Controls and saboteur camera angles are what takes this Silent Hill entry out at the knees. The storyline and voice acting isn’t seminal by any stretch of the imagination but it’s not noteworthy poor. The puzzles are weak and there is a lot of backtracking (RE style) – also not a lot of actual area to explore. For an open town the game has you on rails for a good majority of it.

Camera angles that can really get in your head

The game does certain things right but it does so many little things wrong that it begins to become a serious distraction. The small unnecessary changes are enough to anger longtime fans. The nurses now see and react to noise/light/everything – just another static sprite that is easy to avoid but lacks any of their signature creepiness.

You can pick up large heavy objects to toss at monsters – which is cool – but kind of pulls you out of it as you go through your inventory and realize that your character is carrying twelve portable TVs, three filing cabinets, sixteen I.V. drip bag stands and six different guns. I am not a huge fan of Resident Evil’s death-by-no-inventory-space strategy but how many fax machines can one guy hold?

Not to mention you don’t even really need weapons most of the time. The ability to punch your enemies is overpowered for a survival horror game. I have beat up so many nurses in the past week I could star in my own episode of COPS.

Bottom line: Please for the love of all things holy – Konami – if you are going to outsource one of your flagship franchises please let it be to Kojima Productions. I don’t give a shit what beef you guys have. Figure it out and lets do this.

SHOP TIL YOU DROP

Now here is where it gets tricky. To be frank, even the bad games I adore. I just love playing games. I love buying them, I love looking at my horrible collection of bargain bin trash just as much as any rare games I find. Like little trophies made from melted garbage can lids. They’re mine and I absolutely enjoy playing and writing about them.

Generally, on this blog I deal almost exclusively with cheap games. This game? Not very cheap. Luckily for me, I purchased this years ago before everything Silent Hill exploded in price online.

I would never, ever tell anyone what to buy or what not to buy. I wouldn’t even judge anyone for buying Rule of Rose for $16,999. I mean, I would hope you would find it cheaper but whatever at the end of the day it’s your money, you work hard for it, you spend it on whatever you want.

Right now it looks like it’s averaging about $110-120 on eBay.

Is it worth $2300? I’d have to give it a hard, “no.” But I clean pools for a princess that pays me in bad games – so you do you. I would suggest checking out eStarland or Lukie Games over bid sites for collector’s series games like Silent Hill. There are a ton of gougers that will buy everything up just to raise prices even higher upon resell THUS continually driving up market prices for regular gamers like you and I. Dicks.

DESERT ISLAND SONG

The classic that can get anyone in the mood. Even if it’s for Origins:

Periwinkle’s Lowing Hanging Fruit Punch Ingredients

1.) A small chunk of fur from Parka (Cold Winter)

2.) A thimble of Jack Bauer’s sweat (24: The Game)

3.) A can of Reservoir Dog Food (Reservoir Dogs)

4.) A handlebar mustache (American Chopper)

5.) Blood of a Backstreet Boy (American Idol)

6.) An impossible to control Q-Tip (CSI)

7.) The tooth of a terrorist (Fugitive Hunter)

8.) One Mona Lisa Smile (The Davinci Code)

9.) One Copy of, “Night Rocker” by The Hoff (City Crisis)

10.) One blood stained trucker hat. (Silent Hill: Origins)

Suggestions? Requests? Send me a message!

The Haunted Mansion on Paradise Island

POSTCARDS FROM PARADISE

When I was young my father told me there was a curse in my family. He told me to never tell any of my friends at school because everyone would laugh at me and call us crazy. Very seriously he sat me down and explained to me that he sees ghosts. I believed him then and believe him to this day because now, I see them too.

The conversation and sentiment itself haunted me for years. It rattled around the passages of my brain like little pac-man ghosts just before I’d fall asleep. Then one day well into adulthood I had finally understood what he meant.

I was driving down the road one summer afternoon and I saw a friend of mine walking by himself that had passed away years before. He was an old boss of mine and of a very distinct build. He was about 6’4 and heavier set. Bald, thin gold rimmed glasses and bearded. A bit of a hunched back but strong as an ox. We locked eyes as I drove by and he too seemed to have stopped in his tracks. Don had been dead for close to five years at the time. So what the hell was he doing walking down the street?

I was so convinced and baffled I pulled over to the side of the road. I looked in my rear view mirror. There he was walking down the road alone seemingly toward my car. I pinched myself. Was I dreaming? I waited for him to pass by as I held my breath staring. Somewhat awkwardly a man who looked nothing like him passed by my car noticing my weird behavior. It wasn’t Don at all. I had successfully stalked a random grown man who was about six minutes away from kicking my ass.

Probably a bit crazy, with a bit of an out of control imagination and lack of healthy coping skills would probably explain the “ghostly encounters” I’ve had from time to time. As I get older more and more reminds me of my past and it’s rarely anything to be afraid of.

So when I received my orders from the Palace to investigate a newly unearthed haunted mansion in the forest on the island I wasn’t shaken in the least. Ghosts and spirits are only as dangerous as you allow them to be. Even 999 of them.

Friday afternoon I swung by Indigo’s hut and left him a couple of big T-Bone steaks, Turkey Legs, Mead – all things the Viking types love as a thank you for taking care of my pool duties over the weekend. I was packed and ready to spend the weekend investigating the history of this mystery mansion. Ever curious for a glimpse into the after life I was on my way – alone. Cookie wanted to go with me but I had to convince him I’d be alright alone. I even had to throw some fish in the other direction to distract him.

It took me most the afternoon with compass in hand before I had arrived at the dilapidated mansion in the thick of the forest. But the forest wasn’t much of a forest and the dilapidated mansion wasn’t very dilapidated. In fact – while it might have been haunted – this place was anything but abandoned.

Out of my price range.

Somewhere deep in the bowels of the mansion a man watches over dozens of monitors with cameras all over the property. Glaring at the screens he asks himself, Who is this little man with glasses and child bearing hips? As far as Albert knew Umbrella Corporation said that this island was abandoned. Had they landed on the wrong island? Ah too late now. He decided to introduce this unwelcome visitor to his first devastating line of defense. “Take this” he said aloud as he let out a deep laugh and pushed a red button.

If you’re going to be evil do yourself a solid and get some cool sunglasses.

“Ick – is that poison ivy?” I asked myself. I had been examining a strange logo towards the front gate. It looked super familiar but I just couldn’t place it.

Looks pleasant enough.

As I was examining the logo I heard an electric current coming from the ground as I stepped back not knowing what to expect. The ground in front of me cracked open. Just a tiny little hole and a little pole came shooting out. As the pole retracted – a sign unfolded.

“NO TRESPASSING – PLEASE ~ UC”

As I stared at the sign a little camera on top looked me up and down. I imagined some beefy security guard ready to mess me up (still shell shocked from the Seemingly immortal security guards of Trigger Man) Did I travel all this way just to be deterred by a “No Trespassing” sign?

There was a small speaker at the bottom of the sign to speak into. I held the button down.

“..Hello?”

Albert Wesker stared at this pudgy little man in a purple suit and sighed. He took his signature sunglasses off and rubbed his temples. If the “No Trespassing” sign wouldn’t stop this maniac than what could? He looked around the security room and thought of something.

– still pressing the button on and off –

“ Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Echooooo echoooooo echooooooooooooo. I’m going to trespass! You better stop me. I’m here to see some ghosts. Ya hear me? I’m gonna do it! Ya hear?”

Wesker looks at the camera to see the silly man stretching his leg in the air past the sign and then putting it down on the ground.

“There. I did it! Told you I would! You’ve been tre-passed upon”

Suddenly the sound of another electric current and now a larger retractable pole came out of the ground. This with a small black box on top. A voice came out of a speaker in it.

“Hey idiot. There are no ghosts here. If you must know his is a zombie mansion, bozo!”

Now I’d be lying if I were to say self doubt wasn’t becoming a serious issue for me at this time. So I resigned to cutting my losses BUT I didn’t want to leave empty handed and almost as if the trespassing sign could read my thoughts the voice proceeded:

“Hey idiot. I know you’re going to ask for some sort of souvenir because you’re a simple, disgusting little creature. So open the box and there you will find all that you need. And then get out of my face. Now where did I put-

Souvenirs!? I no longer cared what this guy had to say. Toys? Tshirts? FOOD!??!? Opening the box I found three things. A copy of The Haunted Mansion with a sticky note that said, “for your ghost hunting needs.” Next I found a t-shirt that said, “I got infected by the T-Virus and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt.” I didn’t know what the hell the T-Virus was – I’m not a scientist. I could not care less. But I could always use more clothes. The last thing I found was some weird vial that looked like it had some like weird red spiral thingy in it. Looked sorta spicy – might add it to some chili or taco night or something.

Happy with my bounty I clicked the TALK button and thanked my new friend for the game, shirt and red sauce. He started shouting something but I was running out of daylight and started to head back. Didn’t see any ghosts but maybe I would tonight – as I dip into The Haunted Mansion.

New And Improved Video Introduction

Released: October 14 2003

Developed by: High Voltage Software (Lego Racers, COD 2: Big Red One)

Published by: TDK (whom would fold and be purchased by 2k)

It’s important to note right away that The Haunted Mansion is based on the actual ride at Disney World and not the Eddie Murphy film which happened to ALSO be released in 2003 and was based on the ride as well.

In short – the video game was much better received critically than the film. Even though I love me some Jennifer Tilly.

I wish I had a big glass ball with Jennifer Tilly in it. Wait that came out weird.

The game features none of the likenesses or anything you would have thought would be in it because it wasn’t until after I purchased it that I realized it’s not based on the film adaption. Which ultimately is for the better. So instead of Jennifer Tilly playing the role of Madame Leota it is voice actress, Lisa Donahey – who could win a Kathy Bates voice imitator of the year award for her work in the game.

Regardless of the heavy southern drawl and the constant reminder that this mansion is located in the Deep South of Louisiana the voice acting is really good. Light, fun and convincing. A level of quality you would expect from just about any Disney product. But unfortunately the game does have some audio flaws despite superb voice acting. The soundtrack will cut out randomly and muddle at times. The sound effects can also get pretty redundant and ear splitting if you’re a headphones player like myself.

Sound issues aside this game is pure fun. Obviously with the exception of an occasional jump-scare as far as horror games go The Haunted Mansion is toothless. But it doesn’t make it any less fun.

Full of challenges and a huge mansion to explore. Whacky characters and easy to learn controls this game was a super entertaining and enjoyable spook fest. Highly recommended for fans of 90’s Halloween comedy like Hocus Pocus and Casper

SHOP TIL YOU DROP

Used on eStarland this is going for bargain bin prices. Hovering around $3.50. That’s pretty in tune with what I’ve seen on eBay. There is a brand new copy going for $37 dollars still sealed so this game right now has little to no resell or collectors value. But for the price you can’t beat the entertainment factor. I’m glad I own it and I would definitely suggest for my fellow retro enthusiasts for a fun game towards Halloween.

PERIWINKLE’s GIN AND GEM INGREDIENTS:

1.) One liter of jet fuel (Ace Combat 04: Shattered Skies)

2.) A crystal ball with a southern lady’s head in it (The Haunted Mansion)

DESERT ISLAND SONGS

“If dreams are like movies than memories are films about ghosts”

What is your favorite playful scary movie? Any games you play every Halloween? Let us know.

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What if my Blog was a Pokémon Game? The Paradise Region is Born

Hear Ye Hear Ye, Princess Pinkie has Returned with a new Pokémon Post


My sweet loyal subjects, as you may know I love theorycrafting and coming up with my own concepts for movies and games! I already designed concepts for about two Pokémon games..but non of them were about me! Now that I am a princess , I think we should change that. Sure we have Alola as a tropical region! Yet there were no gyms! You were the first Pokémon Champion ever.. it did not feel like the big leagues! It felt.. like a vacation! Yet what if I were to make my blog and it’s backstory into a whole new Pokémon Region and Pokémon Game! What would we get?! Today I will answer that question for you!

The Map

First of all we will need a general design for our region .. and that can be tricky! Hoenn has too much water for many while yet other people do not really like the whole circle motion you follow in Unova and Kalos. However Game freak really does seem to love this type of movement as you do it in Galar and Alola as well.. although a bit more disguised and tiered.  Luckily Paradise has gotten a map recently that we can use to give both the game designers as well as the pokémon fans what they like. You see Paradise is a heart shaped island, with the resort entrance lying in the tip of the heart and other things being located on the beaches around it.   The heart of the island is set for the pool area, everything seems to flock a bit around that so for our journey we will make the pool area our Pokémon League.  Since we already had a Hawaiian theme.. let’s make this one Mediterranean mixed with cuban elements. Latin..tropical! So let’s call the final city we visit Piscina City.. It’s pools after all.

The official Paradise Map!

By taking elements from our island we can easily make elemental towns! The starting town would be called Registrase which is a rough translation of check in! All around the heart we have some elements that can be adapted. My castle can be translated into a fairytale town, along with a fairy type gym!  Kaiju lake could be a lake filled with mysteries.. which in Pokémon games.. means ghost types.  The Bar or the restaurant could be converted into a fire town, while the docks obviously are the place to go for water types!  While we would be following the shape of the heart  we sometimes can move land inward for some new adventures.. or even go out to see for some water based minigames, or to investigate some strange events with gym leaders or other characters. The gardens could be thick jungle.. boucy ball beach could feature a roadblock pokémon that you can avoid by navigating trough half submerged caves. Plenty is possible, but as an idea we will scale our island up 100 times or so and turn all of our existing elements into towns.

A rough draft of how my Region would look in Pokémon Map style

Legendaries

Patchwork concept version of Patadeseo

Any good generation game has two box art legendaries and in this case it will be a Unicorn and a Duck legendary. A Fairy Fire type for the Unicorn, and a Water Dark Type for the duck! The Unicorn stands for Passion and the Duck will stand for Desire. We all know one can have a burning passion.. or a burning desire.. but in this case, that desire.. is when one pushes too deep. Let them be swallowed/consumed by desire.. let it be all around them with nothing else around.  Like a dark ocean.  The Unicorn we shall call Passiocornio and the duck will be called Patadeseo!  Both spanish portmanteaus of Passion Unicorn and Desire Duck respectively. Of course the duck would look really cool.  Plus words like Passion and Desire would fit really well in a tropical theme.  Of course to sell the games we need to avoid the word Desire so the games would be called Pokémon Passion and Pokemon Conviction.

Passiocornio recolour concept based on art by XiaoDarkCloud

Unlike other Pokémon legendaries who have been attributed to Pokémon life, we find out that Passiocornio and Patadeseo guide humanity, they have the ability to “speak”  through humans through a sort of voice in their head. It keeps the world of humanity going forward. It keeps humanity progressive, without these Pokémon humanity surely would lose the will to go on and become great pokémon masters!  So  you as the trainer will have to find a way to protect both these Pokémon from the evil team. Compared to other pokémon journeys that would have come before.. This journey would focus much more on what it means to be a trainer and dive into the human aspects of this world. Why do pokémon follow humans that closely, why do pokémon grow stronger when working with humans?!  Questions like these will be answered through the story with the legendaries as we really take a look at our part in this symbiosis. 

The Evil Team

Man in Black | Anime-Planet
Team Mahan Grunt

Since I brought up the evil team just now I think that is a good next step to take in creating this world. This time the evil team would take the form of the FBI like people. “Agents” who feel the world is better off with them in control. With them policing over the world.  Events with them would be them selling Pokéballs with tracking chips to people, breaking into a tower to turn around the signal so they can use the radio to eavesdrop on people and potentially them wanting to shut down Pokémon Laboratories because they do not feel 10 year olds are ready to have Pokémon yet.  Yet outside these evil deeds, we also see them volunteer to find every missing kid or help out with other problems in the Pokémon world.. as long as they receive praise and status. I will call them team Mahan. Which basically is a reference to the “The Man”  which is often used for government instances. I feel like having a red white and blue colour scheme would get me in trouble.. so let’s say they wear all black and look a bit like the agents in the Matrix.

Mahan Boss Orwell

The Leader of the evil team is called Orwell and while having a legit reason to be the way he is he will be among the more evil villains in the series. Orwell’s son.. George once took of on his trainer journey much like the player before him. Orwell did not want him to go.. but there was this passion in the boys out and Orwell knew he could not stop him.  Yet on his journey George met an untimely end.. Orwell tried to warn humanity to abolish kid trainers or even children having Pokémon.. but no one would listen and that’s when he realised humanity was stupid! It could not take care of itself… he would have to protect them against themselves.  By Capturing both legendaries he can link everyone’s Passion and Conviction and complete .. the Hive Mind.. a machine he can use to pierce the subconscious of all humans, this way he can protect them from themselves and enslave mankind .. free from it’s whims. Such a theme will be chosen because it meshes well with what Paradise and me are about.. but it also ties in nicely in the exploration of humanity story that is this game.

The Starter and the Rivals

Sobble crying is pretty relatable for me... | Fandom
Sobble Cries because all the starter Elitism and hate

That is right I wrote rivals as a Plural, so this means we are going to have multiple rivals in my game! Symbolising the variety of content you can get on Paradise. However this game will not feature all rivals such as Sword and Shield or  Kalos or any other multiple rival game.. no this game will only have one of them, you will have two.. but who they are all depends on your starting choice.. where in lies the biggest difference from all Pokémon games. You see I do not think we need more pokémon persé. With a Biodiversity of over 920 species we don’t need THAT much more. I’d rather see some extra regional variants to make old pokémon more relevant again maybe with an evolution here or there but I do not think each generation needs 100 extra pokémon. In my opinion one of the most toxic things about new games coming out .. is the starters.  People are SOOOO ungrateful when it comes to new starters.. and we have taken that whole grass water fire thing far enough! People are never really happy anymore.. which is why I propose a radical change in how starters work.. I will make a more in depth post about that some other day…maybe!

luizvc's Custom Pokemon Type Symbols | Pokémon elements, Pokemon, Pokemon logo
Pick what type of trainer you want to be!

My idea is that instead of just being asked what your preferred gender is, we also get a question about what your favourite typing is. From that question you will be assigned a pokémon of that type as a starter.. as long as it follows a few parameters, such as knowing an offensive move at level 5 and learning an additional one that gives a Same  Type Attack Bonus by level 15. You can get ANY Pokémon from that type in the game.  Which makes it a much bigger surprise and will make replaying your game feel more fresh. Your rivals would also change at least in my game.. they are bloggers based on your strength and weakness.  I’d pick fairy for example so my biggest Rival would be A guy everybody loves that uses steel type Pokémon and who is very friendly and loves doglike pokémon. 

Variable Rivals, this one might be the fire user

My weakness Rival would be this busy bee girl who specialises in fighting types but also carries a gardevoir as her magical girl. She lloves to lift weight and talk in length about her Pokémon on Radio Shows. Two very nice behavioured rivals, but say had you picked the Psychic type, one of your rivals would be the mysterious man with a one letter name  who would use dark types and act all mean.. even though it is just an act. He wears a tophat and talks with movie quotes a lot.  This would also impact the story at least in an illusion of choice kind of way. Where my steel rival with golden eyebrows  happily tags along you to defeat Team Mahan, a certain anime blogger for example has much less time..and is probably drunk.. so instead she rushes ahead.. only defeating half of the trainers.. leaving you with equally plenty experience to gather from these trainers…but the with your battles unfolding somewhat differently.

The League

The Fairy Type Gym Leader

The Paradise League would feature 8 gym leaders like normal, and they would be based on characters I have on my blog albeit less stolen. Instead of Nakiri Alice as my chef, we’d get a cook, that is also a chemist that loves cooking with his fire pokémon. His gym puzzle would involve gathering ingredients and applying some science to it to produce the correct dish. If you fail.. a clean up crew comes along.. they are annoyed that they have to work now and will attack and battle you. The fairy castle town will feature Chibi Pinkie as a Gymleader dressed like a jester! She wants you to give gifts to the Princess subjects.. they give you a small description of their desired gift..and if you give them the right one.. they WILL honor you with a battle. If you give them the wrong gift they get sad and Jester Pinkie will be angry and become more difficult in battle.  Other gyms would work in similar ways with gym puzzles involving a chore or event that is tied with Paradise actual location.

The Elite four is very simple!  It’s my writing Staff. Indigo would be a steel type user with Bisharp as his ace, Kuro would be a ghost type user with a Regional and better Dusknoir as their ace. Sunny would be a water type user and his ace would be a shiny Milotic that you see raise him from a Feebas earlier. The most ugly fish now turned beautiful is a great metaphor for Sunny.  Periwinkle would be a Dragon Type user.  Dragon’s symbolises his need to put obstacles in his own way by playing super shitty games! His team has a lot of Outrage users and he is an elite 4 leader with a twist. His Pokémon are of a higher level.. but they function like they don’t always obey him.. much like traded Pokémon of to high level.  Periwinkle’s Pokemon are so powerful he soldiered through.. but you need to take advantage of this by using paralysis and confusion tactics to fight him.. it’s not just sheer offence!   His signature Pokémon would be a Druddigon to symbolise this character best.

The Paradise Elite Four
Palm SIBERIA (Character) | aniSearch
Lovable Socially Awkward Professor Palm

The Professor of the Region is a part of this gym journey as well, she is a female professor called Professor Palm. She looks a bit like Palm from Hunter x Hunter as well and her gimmick is that she is massively socially awkward. She represents the geek in all of us, and while she can passionately talk about pokémon… each time she becomes aware she is doing it she freezes up!  She is the polar opposite of professor Sycamore and talks in a very stuttery wayl She is actually a woman of science and has that scientist nervousness! She isn’t a people person and is a bit awkward around children. She will be a fun addition to the Pokémon professor family! She truly is a scientist who dedicated her life to Pokémon. She will utterly be able to talk to the main character and then introduces us to the follower Pokémon mechanic after which she speaks to you trough your Pokémon. “Bulbasaur Tell Pinkie that this Pokédex can register all types of Pokémon” Kawaii!

The Champion

Can you beat the Paradise Champion?

At the end of your journey you would face the champion of Paradise and that would of course be yours truely! Throughout the journey you encounter me a few times. I’d  follow a princess theme!  So I’d be dressed regally like Iris and have mannerisms that hold in between Cynthia and Diantha.  An Amalgamation of the best elements of every female champion. I’d be the ruler of the island as well but this time we will show a person in power is actually not evil! I am sweet!  During the game I will use several teams but always carry my Sylveon with me.  I will  mention that I use several pokémon so all my friends can go out to play. When I support the main character I will carry a team of five pink pokémon, mentioning I have a sixth but people would go crazy if they knew I had it! Early in the game you can find me adopting a lost stuful! 

My champion team would fit a princess theme as well. I would have a Kantonian Rapidash to symbolise my unicorn. A Sirfetch’d would be my knight  and Bewear would be my teddy for tea parties.. speaking of tea parties , I’d have an Appletun and Polteageist to be the sweets and tea of a princess party. My final Pokémon would be my Ace Sylveon! I carry that everywhere I go. I know I said Rapidash isn’t in the Pokédex.. and it is not!  It is mine and mine alone! It will help simulate the bratty part of the princess. In My rematch team I use a hybrid of my pink team and princess team. Chansey with Toxic as a lead, Sylveon as an Ace, Bisharp instead of Sirfetch’d for coverage.the teapot would probably still make the team as well an Ariados would make the team for more toxic stalling options and finally I would have a Mew.. which we would give a new form, cause we gotta make some sales! And that  is how Paradise became a game!

The Champion and her first Pokémon League Team

And that is how I’d imagine Paradise as a Pokémon Region/Game. How would your blog look as a Pokémon Region?! What would your champion team be? Do you think my team fits me?! Let’s talk geeky, though I might be napping! Because remember! Friendship is Magic, but dreams are even more wonderful. Oyasumi!

If you want to help me fund this game.. ..but realise I am joking here and you just want to support me.. consider helping me out by buying me a cofee.. or as I like to call it .. A Royalty.. once again Oyasumi!

The Knights of the Pink Table: The Powerful Females in my Court

Hear  Ye Hear Ye,  Princess Pinkie is back with another post for all you loyal guests and subjects! A while ago I addressed the Powerful Female Tag created by the majestic lady Annie!  After this had been done I was  been tagged not once.. but two powerful females of WordPress. Meg and Mari, both ladies who I very much respect! I wanted to honour them by doing this tag… but I did it already and I felt I could not really redo it without invalidating my first picks! So.. I mutated it… I needed some knights in my court anyway. So this time..instead of doing a Powerful Female Tag, I do a Powerful female Recruition!

The Rule of the Pink Round Table

Large Rosette Flower Tablecloth Blush Blush and White | Etsy
Really cosey using this table with 6 others!

So the original tag had some rules but since this is a bit of a quick repeat I decided to spin it a creative way. For the original rules please visit my original post, or visit the amazing posts of Mari, Meg or Annie. Since I tag people recently already I will also not be tagging people, however I invite people who already have been tagged and get tagged again to keep the spirit of the post alive by showing some creativity!  I know it sometimes is hard to be tagged for something a lot of times, and when questions are not randomised it is hard to be fresh.. but clearly you have been tagged for a reason!. So if you don’t want to do just a single repeat.. consider yourself tagged to come up with a way to do the tag without doing the tag… or any other tag you have been recently double nominated for. 


In the original post Annie made for Woman’s day we had to talk about a woman of great Intelligence, Great Strength, One who Endured a Lot, One who we would love to spend time with, one who inspires us and one who deserves a spotlight.  To keep the spirit alive I will recruit women who embody those aspects. To keep it fresh though, I will this time really be looking from a perspective of who can be a knight . We will give them a virtue since I discovered I am part digimon and virtues is an important thing for their knights and all! 
All virtues will be based on the official prompt. 

The Knight of Knowledge:  Samantha Carter

When I read Meg’s take on this post, I already had been tagged by Mari for a second go! I was working on an idea that could work for a second go around. When I read Meg had tagged Samatha as her first prompt “A Woman Known for her Intelligence” I got an idea!  Because it is indeed true that Sam from Stargate SG1 and onwards is a very smart character, but she is also a competent leader, a great friend and a soldier.   And since a soldier is kind of like a knight.. I think she would do well in that role as well.  Of course her virtue would still be knowledge because that is where Sam shines. She actually compliments every other character really well.  She compliments Daniel Jackson, she compliments O’Neill and she even compliments Teal’q.  While she has also been put into a position of leadership for me Samatha’s strength always lies in how well she pairs with others thus making her a great knight. 

PK1-Gatekeeper! Ready

I’d make her some very cool blue armor , that resembles her navy officer outfit and she would actually be second in command of my little army of knights!  Paradise lies between reality and fiction and while it is not possible to be violent on Paradise Island.. Many people try to illegally cross realms and my knights will help me keep the balance.  Samantha is even experienced in traveling to other worlds. Her designations would be PK-1-Gatekeeper. PK stands for Paradise Knight, the 1 a batch of honour and a call back to that team that brought this amazing woman into our lives.  As  a Weapon I’d give her some wrist operate crossbow guns.  Which resemble pistols a lot! They seem to be Sam’s weapon of choice. Because Sam is so skilled in protecting against bogeys from other worlds.. her nickname will be gatekeeper!

The Knight of Strength : Erza Scarlet


The Knight of Strength would be my Barbarian type knight. Someone who could wear ridiculously huge weapons, like an Axe.. No A HUUUGGE Broadsword.. No big spear! Oh it would all be so cool!  So why don’t I just take it all!  When I look for a knight of  Strength I want her to be able to wreck stuff.. so Anime is an obvious go too!  These women are stronger than most, and very few are as badass as Erza!  Taking on an entire tower filled with monsters and coming out on top!  Besides how cool is it to have your Mage cast fist! She is an S class Mage, that in those stat magazine thingies scores the higest in almost every single category and only in intelligence scores 4 out of five.  She is strong as an ox already and can even ENHANCE it on top of it! Besides that she is super versatile and can be super speedy as well.

PK2-Titania Ready

If it is all the same to her I’d prefer her to be in her Armadura Fairy armor!   Which is her pink armor! It is one of the  strongest armors in her arcenal and allows her to do energy attacks as well , and you guys know how much I like Dragon Ball so energy attacks are hype!  Plus she is probably one of the two knights I want to keep close. Probably my right hand knight! So it has to be in a colour the compliments my outfit! I don’t like crosses as a Symbol so her iconic Heart Kreuz Armor would not be the best. She can switch in her free time but when I am in court I think the cute armor looks best!  Her nickname would be PK-2-Titania! Which is Erza’s nickname!  She can’t hold her liquor well so I have to keep an eye on Kuro. But most of the others knights won’t drink a lot.. maybe the last one. I am kind of afraid that she will be kinda angry at me for making her wear her pink armor! But hey! A princess gotta do what a princess gotta do!

The Knight of Fortitude: Bastila Shan 

I am a big Star Wars fan, mostly of the old republic, one of the characters that impressed me always was Bastila Shan, she is a Jedi KNIGHT, kinda, of the old republic who has endured a whole lot. The daughter of treasure hunter Helena Shan was “given” to the Jedi Order at a young age.  Here it was found out she was exceptionally gifted in the force and she mastered a power called Battle Meditation. With this power she would defeat one of the  most scary and iconic Darths in Star Wars Extended Universe Lore.. Darth Revan, whom she later would redeem, try and save the world with, only to be driven to the Darkside of the Force trough intense torture. She fell in love with Revan and that bond allowed her to be brought back and enabled the pair to save the galaxy and to finally get married. Only for Bastila to lose her husband two years later. Vanished into thin air. Yet even losing everything AGAIN she endured and became a respectable member of the Jedi Council and her great great great or something  granddaughter would end up becoming Grand Master of the Jedi Order. That’s one strong knight and I want her on my team.

PK3-Dreamer Ready

Bastilla isn’t a flawless character, she can be a bit stuck up and she is not that easy going, but that is what endears her to me! She isn’t the type of Jedi that is completely stoic and a near Vulcan, she is a human with her own struggles.  Her Battle Meditation boosts her allies and hinders her enemies,  one of the most powerful force abilities ever..which can also help keep the peace on my beautiful island. Because this requires a translike state, I will give her the handle PK3-Dreamer.  An capable negotiator, with a pretty face, combat skills and the ability to boost her allies. Her mind has been forged in the irons.. tempered by making herself break! Nothing can touch her now!  Her weapon would be a double sword. Much like her iconic yellow Saber Staff!  And I really like her dress style as well!  

The Knight of Kindness:  Kaede “Maple” Honjou

 Okay so.. I do not particularly care about the schoolgirl that is oblivious but quickly gets addicted to MMOs! When I will talk about her I will mostly talk about her alter ego, Maple!  Not that   Kaede isn’t any fun but as a knight Maple would just work a lot better. So let’s just assume we have the option available to us. The original prompt is people you’d want as your Roommate or Friend and Maple definitely has those qualities. She is all about being kind and making friends and just having friends. Despite being a guild leader she isn’t very much a leader and can follow really well as well. No dominant personality here which makes her a whole lot more compatible with me because I have big trouble with dominant energies, It makes me shut down. Maple seems an energy I can handle very well though…plus she is the tank! She protects.. so she goes on the other hand as Erza does. So my left hand?! I forgot which one I said earlier!  

PK4-Pancakes-Ready!

Maple would wear her iconic black armor and would bear the handle PK4-Pancakes. Now I would not come up with that name but she would. She named herself Maple, based on the translation of her name, and her pet Syrup.. which she would probably take along.. in fact I’d ask her! I wanna fly on a turtle as well! Either way Maple has the tendency for sugary names that in some shape, way or form have to do with maple.. and maybe syrup.  Maple Syrup is good on Pancakes!   With her defence capabilities Maple is quite scary.. but she is super funny as well!  If I am in a life threatening situation and I am rolling on the floor laughing because demon Maple is Talking.. I know I picked my knight well.

The Knight of Courage: Jen Scotts

Jen Scotts, Pink Time Force Ranger - Morphin' Legacy

So this is most likely a character that not many people will know about!  Jen Scotts is a power Ranger.. a Time Force Power Ranger from the year 3000 to be exact. She is the Pink Time Force Ranger..which already makes her an excellent candidate to be one of my knights.. but she is a very special pink ranger. You see in the world of Sentai, character traits are colour coded. With Red being the leader, the black or green ranger being the very supporty one, while the blue often works as a second in command or rival to red.  There are some nuances there.. but a good written ranger shows their colour without even wearing matching clothing.  I bring this up because Jen Scotts was a  great Pink.. she would make an even better Red.  She is a leader, and a pragmatic one.  She has passion but can also set it aside to get the job done. Jen Scotts is one of THE best female rangers ever.  While not my favourite one, she takes the number two spot! And since this tag originally was one to be a role model.. definitely beats out my favourite pink Ranger Kendrix out in this one.

PK5-Time Walker Ready


I want to give Jen the chance to be the real leader, the recognised leader and allow her to  take the reigns.  Using the name Pk5-Timewalker she would do the red armor  that also comes equipped with some goggles. Jen had to say goodbye to her love but did so, for the sake of her job! So it means she is loyal and she will make logical choices. Her job comes before herself at many times.. but she has this amazing strong character behind it. I do not like zeal in general ..but I will need someone like that to keep us focussed.  Jen and me in some ways are too different to be friends, and maybe in some ways we are also too similar to be friends so I think of all the knights I’d get along with the least.  Yet she would also be the knight I would rely on the most!  She is a bit the opposite of me while having the same  motivators.. and a sense of drive and spirit! A great role model that may look at things differently from me, but deserves to be called a role model anyway.

The Knight of Hope: Grell Sutcliff

By the laws of colour coding Grell should be a Red Knight..and maybe many will deny that she belongs on the list of strong females.. but the last item on the original list was a powerful woman that deserves a spot light. Grell fits that bill!  Some may not agree Grell deserves to be on this list because Grell was born with some Y-Chromosomes.. but she calls herself a lady, wishing to bear children but  knowing it is not possible since she was born a biological male. Still Grell dreams about dreams about  having a sex change so she can have a sex in line with her gender. That already is something that makes her deserve a spotlight.. but there is more to it! Grell lives in 1888, this means the first sex change was over 40 years away.  Making her choice and desire all the more inspirational. It doesn’t hurt that she is a very capable fighter as well and how cool is a knight with a chainsaw!  

Ara-Ara Sebby Chan!

Grell would be my green knight… because if you haven’t figured out by now .. these knights all have Sentai colours and Grell is not a leader.  Grell is the wild card, the sixth ranger that is a bit different but really cool. She is also everything that Paradise stands for! Being your own person, despite what words society may use. Not letting yourself be defined by the limited vision of others… you are the only person who knows yourself. So if Grell says she is a she… SHE is a she, simple as that.. and so she qualifies as a Powerful female!  She might not be the most fit for the title of “knight” but her living in the 19th century is close enough to be one of the “last generation” of classic knights. She is pretty cooky but can play in a team and she would probably be the one who can help me do the V-Tuber think the most! I think very naturally she would understand the “bonk, go to horney jail’ thing. Grell is amazing and I already have a few loons in my staff! And one day I hope to be embraced by a Malkavian Vampire… so these things are not an issue. I really think she’ll be a good fit.  My Green knight, PK6-Shinigami.

And so my tag has been completed yet again and some powerful women have come together for the same tag in a new way! Like I said no new tags for me! But feel free to join in the fun! Do you like my pick of knights? *Quack* let me know in the comments! Who would your knights be?! If you will pick up the tag, drop a comment as well so I can quack it out! Now my knights! It’s Morphin Time!… In Ye Olden days that should take them a few hours so I will go take a nap! Shine on loyal subjects and amazing guests! Oyasumi *Quack*

The Great Change: A Paradise Restyle

Hear Ye Hear Ye! Princess Pinkie is here with a new post! Her first post in the capacity of supreme regent of the Paradise. Salutations loyal guests and subjects! The time has come! Paradise has evolved from a corporation to a nation! A nation under no god (You can pick one if you so choose, but not a single one is right)  and one princess! Located between imagination and reality! Welcome to the new Paradise. So if you are reading this in WordPress Reader, do take a look at our website over on https://pinkiesparadise.com/

Pinkie restyled

As you may know Pinkie is a name for not one, but two entities. The Homo-romantic-demi sexual woman of 34.. I mean 21 years old living in the Netherlands who types and styles this blog, as well as Pinkie the name for the virtual entity and avatar. The one who manages the tropical island of Paradise as it’s manager. The author Pinkie sends the character Pinkie on a quest to find an item that would allow her to reach her Mega-Evolution. You see the virtual Pinkie discovered she was a virtual life form that evolved multiple times and as such she discovered she had.. at the very least… one transformation left. Hopefully being rid of the moth toxins would help her feel better and healthier.. which in turn may help the real Pinkie feel better and healthier… but for that whole story click the link here!

Rubber Duck Pink Unicorn Duck buy at Hollandwinkel.NL

If people here really read my blog, or those who chat with me in real life people would answer one of three animals for my spirit animal. A panda, a unicorn or a duck. I figured that the panda elements are always intrinsically tied to me due to my lack of libido or grasp innuendo. Since a duck model might be too hard to make I chose to go with the only feasible possibility that will probably mean I am one of the very few people who uses a totem animal like this! I chose for the totem .. that is the majestic unicorn duck! Yet something else needed to change. Over the past year or so I have always portrayed Pinkie as the manager that blogs daily and works hard. I had very much trouble letting that image, I needed something a little bit extra. Someone who is not afraid to coast from blogging every now and again… a flavour excuse ..against my morality saying skipping a day is wrong as it were.. it turns that flavour was changing her from a manager into a Princess.

Which brings us to the new model of Pinkie which is displayed here!

Yay at least virtual me could get a haircut!
My Bag of Holding

Look at that, aren’t I adorable?  As you may see there are several elements to convey all the elements. Let’s first discuss my lovely new dress!  It has a cute frock with hearts, and looks quite a bit more regal! I have a gold crown.. but also a silver crown If I want to look a bit more subtle.. you know.. for when I attend a funeral or something. If you hear some cute little pit pats behind you! There is a chance that it is me on my adorable duck feet! Yes I know that will be hard to model in VRoid ..but you’ll never see that part  in videos so it doesn’t really matter.  There is also duck feathers growing out of me on random places.. but we have found a way to make them all pop out at my diaphragm so it works like kind of a belt.. just below where my corset goes…. the trick is tying the corset so tight I can barely breathe! Another duck element is the cute little duck purse! It is actually a bag of holding so good for all sorts of stuff I need to take out..including power morphers, my magical girl transformation item etc.

Unicorn Mane Twintails

The unicorn-horn holds most of my magical powers..but the duck feather pops out there because I am not an equastian unicorn! I am a duck-unicorn. I can fire lasers from it.. like my Mothra power.. but this time rather than use it for sheer destruction I can also turn everything I hit into marshmallows. I have most of my mothra powers. I can fly, am immortal and can create gust of wind.. this time by plucking a feather and tossing it.. it will create a kawaii tornado. The toxic scales are gone though! Instead I can use the magical heart gems on my outfit to heal others.. or make them play nice with me!  This is also why violence on Paradise island is not possible at all!  Love and peace!  I can switch between my forms.. but I really like this one!

This amazing new avatar was made by the great artist Jezzychii!  For just about €30,- let’s say $35 dollars I had this full body commision within two weeks after ordering! She is very versatile as well and very soon I will commision another piece with her to get acces to some emotions! If you want to check her out please do at:
https://www.fiverr.com/jezzychii

Redesigning the blog

Periwinkle
2.0

A new era comes with a new banner. Yet both Sunny and Periwinkle had a bit troublesome designs to use in a banner. Sunny’s design was made in a variant of the software I used to make the first Pinkie.  It looked close enough to Kuro and Indigo though to use as their actual avatar. However it gave me a lot of trouble composition, as it was only a face I would always be locked into a banner where everyone was in that pose.  Which will become an issue with STAFF if we ever grow. Periwinkle made his character in the days that Chibimaker was no longer playable and found a similar piece of software but it was too simplistic. Which resulted mostly in linework issues.  So I downloaded the program called Flashpoint which allows me to play Flashgames still! It indeed had Chibimaker and thus I created Chibmaker counter parts for them. I had one for Sunny already but now I could unify the style of my staff. This is what I came up with in the end.

A new banner with all my Nakama
New Favicon

I wished to incorporate magical girl and tropical elements in the banner. So I chose a backdrop that feels like a tropical sunset.. but added some sparkles and hearts to also make it feel like a magical girl transformation background. I used a new more princessy font for the title and implemented my brand shade of pink #ff89cd Which is also used for the palm trees.I added the staff and myself to the picture as well as the coconuts.. which also represent the reader and I had a banner I could feel happy with! It feels busy… but very on brand. The border around it is a princessy photo frame that will now be used in several other assets to feel as if separate elements in the blog are all part of the same image, yet also separate.

Jester Pinkie

You may also have seen the chibi version of me hiding behind .. me!  I decided to bring her back as a character on the blog. Mostly she will feature in Paradise stories but she also will double as a Mascotte that  may appear in pictures I make or in general tomfoolery. Maybe she can be featured in some posts from the past! Or overly jokey posts! Oh the possibilities! She does to bonk people on the head with her jester-wand-scepter thing a lot though so she is oftenly in bonk jail! She keeps escaping though and thinking up pranks! I dread the day that she runs of to K and cooks up something really devious!

The frame used in the banner as said will be a recurring element in most assets. Such as the new cocktails/featured images.  Cutting out a round shape for cocktails can be a bit of a hassle and these pictures really did not perform well in my new theme. Instead I opted to go for a more stretched variant, with a cocktail in pink as well as the frame. With an icon depicting what kind of content it is like before. This looks a bit more clean and can be saved as JPEGs rather than PNG’s which also saves me on tons of storage space. I am considering making uniquely coloured variants for the staff, with a cocktail of their own.. but I decided to make these achievements.  With a custom coloured frame unlocking after say 50 posts, your custom cocktail at 100 posts! It gives the staff something to strive for! I think that should be fun!  The icons will be:  A SNES controller for gaming content, a movie reel, for movies and series, a smiley geek for geek content, the crunchyroll logo for anime (open for suggestions for another option for that)  a pokeball for pokemon and a typewriter for fan fiction.  Not much changes in that aspect. The cocktails that will be posted into every category rather than having a rainbow will have no logo and are deemed universal.

Sweet Sweet, ability to edit in featured thing more easily! Also yay Pink!

Finally I changed the blog theme to Chronicle, I needed a change up and really liked some features this theme had to offer. Such as highlighted content per category.  The ability to use banners of any size and just feeling right for the princessy theme I am now going for. It’s a bit busier than my old theme but it has that “sparkly” feeling for me. Just something new to wear for the next year or so. It still lets me use featured images in the way I want it too but now with stuff zooming and stuff happening. It all feels just a bit more… Pinkie! It doesn’t hurt that this theme can utilize my signature shade of pink either!

Redesigning Paradise

Like I said in my 500th post, content from my end my shift a bit to more lighthearted whimsey. Cartoony.. which applies to my “reviews” as well. I will react to them like a spoiled little princess.. or the sweetest magical girl and look at it from a more raw emotional angle. So think at a sarcastic princess talking about burning down a Uwe Boll movie… or a sweet little girl protecting the childhood memories of a movie that is deemed pretty bad by the internet.. but that she kinda secretly loves. Also a lot more weird “my brain” things where I wonder how pokémon taste and such!  For now I have dropped stories like “What Bad Luck, I got reincarnated and now I am a Side Character”. I have Elle’s journey mapped out and one day I might return to it, but it really lacked an audience. Instead I will be doing more stories set in Paradise.. much like how Sunny does, written as stand alone stories..almost comic like. For this very reason I have designed a map of Paradise, which will show you the general layout of Paradise! Which will also be featured in our new About Page. (Pending at the moment of writing)

The Map of Paradise is handed to you upon checking in..and shows up on that weird tv channel hotels have!

What doesn’t change though is that we are still welcoming to Staff Members. I post every other day, with Periwinkle having one or two posts every week and the other staff posting incidentally. I will keep looking for STAFF until we basically can consistently put out a post every day of the week again. So mostly in the anime department I am looking for someone who’d like to join the STAFF still, so if you are interested in joining a lovable band of goofs!  Feel free to give us a shout!  YouTube will be less of a focus for now as my health is recovering, but in time will be implemented more in Paradise. Existing as two sides of the same coin rather than being something separate. Of course Staff members can integrate their other content as well if they wish. I have this dream of people creating content together, all getting a penny of Kofi money or likes in their own way.  Everyone is doing their own thing yet doing it together as well. That to me is Paradise.

I am trying to become more active on other peoples blogs again as well and come back to OWLS as soon as the relentless migraine attacks let up. I am pretty active during my daytime but in the evening I get downed pretty hard. So right now I only have half days!  My blog comes before OWLS right now.. because to be part of OWLS I need to be able to blog to begin with. So there is that. By all means I should get over this soon though, normally this is a seasonal health thing..but with how weird things have been it all has gone on for much longer.  But yes I do plan to be more active in both gamer and anime blogger environments!

Recharge GIFs | Tenor

Energy is returning to Paradise and I hope to let it show.. both on blogosphere and on the fictional island itself!
I thank you for your hard work reading this posts loyal subjects! I would really appreciate interactions, likes, and of course comments. What do you think of the new theme and look? Do you think Unicorn Duck Princess Pinkie is a better fit for me?! Now I worked hard enough for a princess.. so I shall retire to the royal chambers. Shine on my subjects.. Tata for now. Oyasumi! Oh and did you know I have a new Kofi Banner as well?!

Pinkie’s Fantastic Five: Anime Character I’d want as Staff

Hello my little lights, Irina’s Twitter recently reshared some of her older content.. and I am not sure if it is automated or if she randomly selects posts to retweet herself… but  regardless, a post came up that inspired me. Top 5 anime characters I want as personal assistants that one was.  Given the hyperlink I put in there I am pretty sure it is an automated response! Anyway.. I have Staff.. but I can never have enough servants..Uhm I mean Staff.. so here are five fantastic picks for new staff members.

A Maid: Tohru

For the Powerful Women tag Irina sniped Tohru as my answer… and Summer’s as well and I ended up picking Rem as a roommate instead.. but in this new list I can finally admit that in hindsight I do like Tohru more then Rem. Points for Irina though for having such a objectively true opinion! She is more fun to hang out with, she is way more openly gay then Rem is/might be and she comes with an adorable baby dragon, that I do not want to lewd but just feed her living things and see them vanish in her gaping maw in one big swoop! That alone could keep me entertained for days.

She can even bring Kobayashi  , I do not need to engage with her romantically .. though a dragon and a prin…. I mean the manager would be an interesting couple and  I bet we could hit it off.. I am fine either way though as Tohru loves her job and doubles as air transportations. I live on an island but I get seasick very easily but not airsick so this would be a great way to circumvent annoying little troubles.  I could play with Kanna, geek out with Fafnir, drink with Kobayashi, Cry with Elma and ignore the other one..but I bet her assets will draw in a whole lot of business to Paradise. All she needs to do is loaf around on the beach!

I do need a maid because my pool boy keeps inviting people to pee in my pool.. I know that “(definitely don’t) Pee in the Pool.. just means Pee in the pool.. but it has been manager proofed. . Sunny while great at his job.. is only great at it when he does it…which is completely random!  Cabins might get cleaned, or it might not happen and people get a fish in a bucket as an apology instead. I love them both and the content they provide is swell but I need a backup plan. Besides..I am not very clean myself. I would not get down to the floor and clean it! I am so stiff I probably could not get up! Too much soapy stuff also makes my hands all dry and scaly! .. So better just use a dragon! I don’t think they will complain about dry skin.. Maybe Elma would.. but not Tohru! So she is a great Maid.. an okay mode of transportation and a powerful means to defend the island.

A Singer/Pianist: Maki Nishikino

I got Barry Manilow’s bill for booking him each night and let me tell you.. that guy is NOT cheap!  Of course on his day off we have Jimmy Buffet on Paradise but let’s just say that Copacabana is getting old fast for me!  I do it because Winstof keeps yelling for encores and Manilow is getting old enough that he forgets he already gave an encore. I know HER NAME was LOLA and I KNOW she was a showgirl.. Now shut the fuge up Mannilow!  I am not even paying Jimmy Buffet… he just shows up!  Cheeseburger in Paradise.. my touchie!  So it may be a great idea to have our own little artist on the fictional payroll.  Someone who can just play piano during dinner time or bring us singing entertainment in the evening at the bars.  She can also play at my cast…house.. yes A cast house.. is a house thats like a castle.. I totally don’t have a castle!  Ignore that!  Either way a musician is a great idea to have. 

Finally, Barry can take a break!

Maki is an ideal pick because she comes with lots of outfits to fit every mood. She has sung in an idol ensemble, solo and in a tinier girl group so she is very experienced in any form of singing, meaning she has great range. She is skilled at playing the piano and is a sing a song  writer, which also means she wont be running out of songs and we can innovate our repertoire and even play around with the seasons. Snow halation in winter, Natsuiro Egao de 1,2 jump in summer and  a lot of Aishiteru Banzai.. the anthem of Paradise.

Lyrics that roughly translate as “Smile when you’re sad, let all the sadness blow away, because if you can keep smiling, the weather will change, skies will clear, even if you are unsure , the road to happiness will be revealed under blue skies.  Some days it might rain, but remember that this water will also nurture the little tree that is our dreams. Cheers for Love!  It gives the courage to never give up! Now let’s enjoy the present! Cheers for the love, let’s wave goodbye to yesterday, let’s move forward.  Which is a very motivational song! And it’s pretty easy to learn even in Japanese!  Cheers for Love! Singer Hired!

A Tailor: Nui Harime

So is it weird I want a homicidal character as Staff?!  I am not sure, I mean it’s not my dad Nui killed so do I care?!  I don’t think I do.. I mean he was the dad of anime protagonist anyway.. that’s a death sentence either way. So if she had not murdered him it would be a tragic accident,  or a mysterious disappearance. She had to do it by a force greater than herself. Nui is very polite to the people who she serves so as the Royal Couturier of Paradise I think I am in the safe zone.  Did I say Royal.. I mean grand.. her title will just be Royal to avoid confusion with her function in Revocs! Either way Nui is a person that is very compatible with me.. we both love pink, are kind of childish and  are morally slightly more flexible than some of our peers. But hey at least we create our own happiness!  If I see the style of outfits she makes for girls, except for that bancho one.. I love them all Nonnon and Ragyo get such cool outfits from here and her own is cute as a button so that is a thing.

Now you may wonder, why would a tropical resort need a tailor! Well do you know how hot it is in a tropical Paradise.. you have one outfit on for your day at the beach and then one for the night life, equalling to two outfits per day. I don’t launder every day so I have to have a lot of outfits on Paradise.. if I am in my moth-form I also tend to have a nervous tick where I chew on my clothes… except… it’s not just chewing, it is also eating my clothes. Besides.. I can’t host a ball at my place and show up in the same dress  as before.. it’s all duplicate dresses of each other since I still AM an anime character in a way.. but just know each dress you will see on me is always a different one .. once I employ Nui! To this day I have never ever had my white socks turn pink and I am not about to start.. mostly because I am not sure if Tohru would do all laundry.. so just to be safe a personal tailor could be neat. Tailor Hired!
Who.. could also be a good bodyguard!

A Chef: Alice Nakiri

Those who read my Halloween story know my current chef has a bit of a drinking problem! I blame Irina, but hey she comes here for the cheap cooking wine and shares it with the chef once service is done. Then I have to find whatever bush he has passed out and sober him up. It’s just a hassle so I might as well replace it with a bit of a fancier chef that works well with people of stature. The food of Paradise has to be fancy because competition between resorts is fiercer than ever.  Even though Paradise is is only semi fictional still people seem to think they can’t come over to my imaginative island to hang out. 

Alice , kind of looks like the original Irina model..or at least the one I knew as the original.. it’s the white haired one at least.. I may be able to use my chef as a marketing tool by trending it is a much more popular blogger than I am AND she is a chemist…which means that even if I cant fool people there is definitely  a secondary source of income here! I mean she only has to be a chef at lunch and dinner time.. the drunkard can still fry some eggs.. that means Alice can cook something else in the morning or help me teach a few things about high society! She is so useful!

In terms of character Alice seems to walk a fine line between high standards, yet also prefers it if she has the moral high ground while also not shying away from being selfish or petty if it is in her own best interest. I admire that, Alice is tactical and a shrewd business woman.  If you haven’t been able to tell yet, we burn a lot of cash on Paradise and cash management isn’t great on Paradise so far. 

We have Periwinkle who burns a lot of money on very bad games, Kuro who tries every pot noodle in existence, I am not sure if Sunny even knows what money is and Nui seems to have expensive taste. So does Alice.. but she comes from money and she isn’t  unwilling to share it if it improves her working conditions! She is a good team player that is quirky enough to make her interesting. She is super pretty as well.  Which is kind of neat because Alice seems like the chef that really wants to introduce herself to fancy guests at the resort. I need someone like her who can be a bit serious and shape up.. speaking of which this also brings me to my final pick.

An Attendant/Personal Assistant : Marcarita

So any angel from Dragon Ball Super would make for a great personal assistant but I chose the one with the Twin Tails. First of all I could have picked Whis for having the pink uniform but I find him a bit too patronising to his boss. Besides that I feel like someone named after whiskey would become chummy with Indigo! A personal assistant would need to get alone with me.. so that’s why a female angel is a better option. Vados might vocalise her concerns about me to much and makes me more insecure than I need to be. Besides I am not sure if I like Calvados! 

Marcarita is based on the Margarita drink.. and that is a pretty girly drink and I like it! Besides that her personality is like hyper formal will make her look very posh! She would treat me like a little princess in my service and always with the utmost respect. She is used to dealing with clowns and she is fairly strict so she can bring some moral fiber to the rest of the staff.. while allowing me to do whatever I want.. because of hierarchy! She will respectfully advise me though which is a good thing!

Why do I need an Attendant?! Well.. uhm… she can take some tasks away from me and let me nap a bit. If Whis and Beerus are the less formal variant iI am sure this angel can pick up the moral slack of the rest of the staff. She can shape them up a bit while I go play weird video games to provide you with some new content!  It also is a bit of a status symbol and that means if Karen wants to speak to me I have some emotional leverage. I’ll have you know I am important enough to have an angel as a personal assistant madame, your petty complaints are beneath me! 

I could use my assistant to let go of some things,which is good because I am a worrywart!  It’s also doesn’t conflict as much as a butler and a maid. Because I can just let Tohru serve me my food while Marcarita can manage my phone for me. You know do all the text messages, help me be more social on Twitter.. do dailies in my mobile games. So much possibilities! Wipping Paradise back into shape while giving me more nap time! This is an angel I really need to hire! Plus I could try some angel pick up lines!

Time for me to take a nap.. after all this work finding people who would work for me! Now with the staff expanded, it will be time for me to upgrade my tropical hut to something a bit more worthy of a person of my stature! So in our next post we will be looking at some amazing video game real estate! Untill then… Shine on my Little lights! Oyasumi!

The Great Change: A Paradise Story

My dear little lights, the story I have for you today is a new adventure set on Paradise Island, while based in fiction it is also based in reality, just not a whole lot. For the most part this story is just a figment of my imagination..  a springboard for what is to come next. A teaser.. for season four?!  I hoped we could get a few famous guest stars but unfortunately all of them are still locked in their houses due to Covid. Brian Cranston told me he would do it.. but that guy is so overused!  So I passed!

The Beach

The manager of Paradise Island woke up, making some awful wake up sounds, wiping some drool from the corners of her mouth, apparently she bit on her plushy in her sleep again.  Groggily she got up and noticed a feeling of pain and nausea in her system. The dull experience of either a to low blood pressure.. or that sense of uncomfort you get.. just before you get really carsick! Not the  actual sick part.. but that bad feeling you get before. That was her new normal now.  No matter how many vitamins she took, no matter how much walks she would go on and no matter how healthy she ate.. the feeling stayed and it wore her out so often. For days the manager could not get out of bed and she cried. She wanted to make the guests of Paradise happy with all the content cocktails she used to serve before. Yet there simply was not enough energy! Could it be the poison from her own mothiness that kept her down? Unlikely! This problem started slightly more recently.. around the time she started YouTube.. but that dream also gave her so much energy? So what could be wrong.

Doctors could not tell her and explained to her that this might be an advancement of prior conditions. They were trying to help her but no immediate help could be offered, and so yet another day without content cocktails passed on Paradise. The Manager got so frustrated by it that that very frustration made her even sicker. She tried to work.. but for the first time  since she started it all did not sound good enough either. This could not be her glorious return.. and the frustration got bigger and bigger… and because the manager was such a worrywart.. that frustration made her sicker and sicker. Eventually she just lay in bed.. with some lemon tea beside her when she started hallucinating a beach where you encounter all sorts of familiar people…because Grey’s Anatomy did it and it’s really popular now!  So we are doing this.

The sound of the waves were different from that of Paradise island.. and they sand grains weren’t star and heart shaped…which is an actual thing,  no this was not her beach.. this beach was something more akin to that Train Station where Harry Potter met Dumbledore  after he was killed.  As the manager walked on the beach she noticed her footprints left no impressions in the sand.  “The Fudge”  she said.. when someone pulled on her dress. It Design 1 Pinkie.. the Chibi Maker one. “Hi” she said.  “I am the ghost of Paradise past”. 


The Manager patted the O.G. Pinkie on the head but then said sternly. “No!, we are not going to do that, I love you and respect you but we aren’t going the Scrooge route with this story it is so overplayed” Chibi-Pinkie sniffled a bit. “Aren’t you glad to see me then?”  The manager smiled. “Of course I am glad to see you, you are always welcome here and if you chibi maker was still thinking I would use yours more oftenly”. She paused for a moment and hugged the chibi. “Look, I know I had less fun with blogging then when I just started okay, I have become disillusioned with a lot of stuff and might be a bit bitter, I am not striving for the community anymore, and in a way that is wrong but realise this, that is not because I do not want to give these amazing people my attention, I just really lack the energy”.

The Revelation

Chibi Pinkie looked sad and asked “But they are your friends, surely they deserve your time” to which the manager nodded. “Of course they are.. but writing and making content is also my hobby, right now when I am done writing something, I need to lay down that’s how easily fatigued I get, I want to try to be there for these amazing people but it is hard to balance it all and I am looking for the balance, as much as I appreciate you, my sweet Chibi self.. I think I need to  find that balance myself, I do not need a vision of how I changed. So tell me who the ghost of Paradise present is okay?”  Chibi Pinkie nodded and said “It’s Periwinkle.. you used to spend so much time on images and now he isn’t even added to the banner yet”  The Manager chuckled.

“Yes.. I was planning to do a new banner.. but this whole story is kind of the reason why that new banner isn’t there yet, there are more things changing so he’s gonna be on the banner that is coming soon, I promise” The manager smiled looking at her former self.. and then had a thought! “Why don’t you stay around for a little.. I might have a job for you if this story is going where I think it is going.. and I should know cause I am writing it. “Soon we will reveal your thing too”  Chibi Pinkie cheered! 

“So who is the ghost of Paradise future” the manager asked after the celebration was over. “It is your best friend in the whole world,”  Chibi Pinkie said.  The manager smiled. “Ah I haven’t seen him since just before christmas”.  She then looked up at the sky and called out it’s name “Tamago Tomodachi, come on out I know you are there” Please come down from the sky and bestow us with your wisdom”. Both Pinkies looked up to the sky as a fried egg descended, smiling.. and smelling. “Yay it is I the ghost of Paradise Future, come with me Pinkie I have to show you a vision of….”  The manager waved it away “Yeah yeah yeah.. we are skipping that part, we know I have to change.. but how… but let me ask you first.. how did you become the ghost of Paradise Future?” .

The Egg pondered a bit and then began it’s tale. “Well You see, this is a Christmas Carol spoof, and when the three ghosts are brought up the third ghost usually is some obscure cameo of a character you saw in whatever franchise does the spoofing”.  Pinkie nodded as it made sense! “And how do I change.. I mean.. the moth stuff kinda seems wrong to me know”. The Egg shook it’s yolk. “It was not a mistake Pinkie, it was a step you needed to take to find your true self, anyway to find out how you become the new you, you first must discover what you are”.

“Find out what I am? I am a Kaijuman , I went over this a few times”. The Egg nodded while closing his eyes looking all smug and wisey. “While this is true, it would  narratively  prevent the development you have commissioned that will arrive in the near future. So nay you are not just a Kaijuman”. The egg spilled some yolk into the ocean as  giant eggplants grew from  that spot. Just to remind the audience this was a fever dream of sorts… maybe?!  “I am VTuber and VBloggger does that have to do anything to do with it?” asked the manager. “Yes , you are a virtual being, only existing in the online atmosphere.. So what would be an other word you could use for this” said the egg, while trying to look like a japanese Kung Fu master, which isn’t easy if you are just egg whites and yolk. 

“Fake”? asked manager Pinkie. “You are to sincere to be fake” the  egg said. “Digital?” Asked Chibi Pinkie. “Correct little one” the egg now said. The manager pondered and then gasped. “Wait , I am a digital life form that over my nearly two years of blogging has evolved three times… each form bigger and more powerful than the other… am I a Digimon?”.Tamago Tomodachi smiled and said “I can not imagine we would be allowed to use that trademark..but you are basically exactly the same” The manager then shivered. “Does that mean I have to be shot by my family to achieve my Mega Form?” . Her best friend laughed so hard more yolk fell and  the ocean almost became entirely obscured by eggplants. “No, that final evolution needs something different each time, you need to find an item this time”

The Item

Pinkie was very confused by this revelation, so I am something like a Digimon, but not quite…. because of copyright stuff and such.. and I have been trough my Rookie, Champion and Ultimate form.. and to find my perfect form I need an item?  What is the logic behind that?” The rich buddy of the manager finally stopped laughing  and said “Travel to fictional Japan and it will be clear”.  The manager got annoyed and crossed her arms. “If I leave here Periwinkle will let everyone piss in my pool! Indigo has been gone for  while now, Kuro likes to drink from her own bar and Sunny is Sunny. I can not leave this place alone! I am the manager!” The egg nodded compassionately “And there-in lies your problem, you are to weak right now to work every day… you need to become a ruler of this island that doesn’t need to be here every day, so you can recover and get your strength back” . Both Pinkies crossed their arms “And what type of boss would not need to take care of her staff all the time” they said. Tamago Tomodachi  replied sternly. Go to Japan inside your imagination and find out.  Once you are there you will be given your final clue.

“Guess I can finally use these wings for something,” the manager said while picking up Chibi Pinkie. “Let’s go little one” As the two zoomed across the ocean they both realised they were lucky that the fictional Island of Paradise was located somewhere between Fictional Indonesia and Fictional Japan.. and though the power of Imagination and fueled by laziness and limited energy it turned out that this island was a heck of a lot closer to Japan.  Chibi Pinkie and Manager Pinkie did have a bonding moment though where the little version enjoyed flying on the big version. I Imagine you should imagine something like that scene from the Never Ending Story movie, with the song Bastian’s Happy Flight being covered on the Kazoo.. with just enough difference to not be deemed the same song. Landing somewhere in Tokyo the pair immediately spotted a green little turtle. “Oh look it’s our friend Mallow” Chibi Pinkie said.  Manager Pinkie nodded “How convenient, he is always willing to help, I am sure it will be no different this time”. Chibi Pinki, Mallow and the manager shared some takoyaki together.. because… when in Rome and all that. Mallow had revealed to them that the item they would need was at Sony’s headquarters.

Making their way through town the Pinkie’s wondered why it was Sony’s headquarters. Sony is more a Periwinkle thing.. maybe Kuro and even Indigo. Pinkie rarely even touched her PlayStation… was it that? Was she catering to a wrong audience and tapping into the playstation crowd would save her?!  She still felt more like a Nintendo person and most of the content she had planned for the future would be Nintendo as well!. Inside Sony’s headquarters everything seems odd.. as if everything was a really bad anime. Everything looked a lot cheaper. “Have we run out of budget?”  Pinkie wondered to herself?.  They took an elevator up and Manager Pinkie promised to find a place for Chibi Pinkie by her side as a mascot of sorts. Rantan , her current mascot, kept floating off. When the elevator doors openend the delegation of Sony was ready for Pinkie.. they bowed to her. “Weird? Why are you bowing to me?” The Sony delegation cracked a smile at her. “Periwinkle..puray… baaaad peeeeee -eeesss tuuuuoooo game-uuuh, he spenda… lot of money on.. Pee-essss tuooo. So.. if Paradisuuuu remain…….we…..get money….. so we helpuuu. 

Pinkie pondered and then figured, they could be right. Her “employing”  Periwinkle did lead to someone buying American Chopper on PS2, not many people of sound mind would do that , so in a way she was helping Sony get rid of a lot of unwanted stock, maybe he could tempt people into buying these.. like their own Angry Video Game Nerd.. but.. ..with a lot of urine in her pool. But what item could PlayStation have to make her Non-Copyrighted-Digivolve into something beyond a manager?  Did they have some magic power?!  Was it because they have the best Digimon games? When the president came out with a mysterious box it suddenly dawned on Pinkie… as he bowed in front of her and opened the box and a smile appeared on her face and a sparkle returned to her eyes as she uttered the words. “Yes, I think that will do nicely’ 

The Paradise Weekly Gazette 7 (4th to 10th Januari)

Greeting little lights of mine, my first full week as a Kaijuman has passed.  A new(ish) style , a lot of staring into lamps, much gaming fun and some anime later! How did it go?!  Well ……Pretty terrible! Huh?! Really?! Yep, I had one of my worst weeks yet! But ..do you wanna know a secret?!  This week has been one of the most fun I had with creating content yet! So yay for that! So will things change next week? Maybe a bit.. but I am having fun!  So Maybe not!

Pinkie’s Posts

This week I have been starting Let’s Play content , and so far I have clearly not found an audience for it! I have been delighted to make content like that in this way though! Just me with a few games I like going deep and playing to my heart’s content! It has been a blessing!  I can have felt so much motivation to write again, so much motivation to game again, both boost each other and I am having so much fun! Now I know a lot of you aren’t actually into video games so it does make sense.. but I’ve only gained 5 likes on two of my Let’s Play posts.. Don’t get me wrong though I am not upset about it… I kind of like it weirdly.  Well that’s wrong.. but I feel like I am good enough having fun, and sharing me having fun.. rather than getting lots of likes.  Yet in case you missed it here are my posts of this week. Visit them by clicking the coconut!

I talk about my new V Blogger Persona in this post!

I play a Pokémon game with cute Girls instead of Pokémon in this post!

I listen to some awesome video game music in this blog!

More cute anime girl Pokémon…including the Ultimate Waifu can be found here!

I watched me some Zombie Land Saga (Episode 2)

I played a RomHack of one of the Best JRP’s Filled with Anime References

Next week I will continue chasing my VTuber/VBlogger dream, so there will be a lot of content in the same style! There might be more variation as I plan to bring more variety in my content. For example I plan to do a “series” of posts that highlight some of my favourite content creator series on YouTube.. as it is my dream to one day branch out to it. I am also having ideas for a new “What If” like series.  Yet rather than making episodic content I will look at how a scenario would evolve on a grander scale. Think of stuff like “How would the remainder of Tengen Toppa go if Simon was killed instead of Kamina” I’ll probably start with a rework of “What if Ash was a girl”  covering the entire Kanto region story. I am not sure if it will be posted, as for now my focus is on building material and having fun , and my let’s plays do give me a lot of fun.. but expect content like that soon. Also expect a lot more Moemon.  I will also go shop for weird and fun Japanese items again!  This time inspired by my new found Mothiness and being a Kaijuman I hope it will be funny!

Camp Coconut Updates

The staff was in awe with my transformation to write some posts this week! Sunny was very intrigued and has been talking to the water surface a lot! Indigo has been spending time dimming the lamps.. to keep me from getting distracted and I made them undo it! I need my lamps.. and Kuro has been trying not to simp over me.. so I tasked them with watching a lot of VTuber content so they can advise me properly and give them someone else to simp on!

The coconuts have been pretty active!The  Buddy Coconut has been helping me pay for my domain whose payment was due this month!  So we can keep Paradise up for another whole year!  Meanwhile the Woo Woo Fishy Coconut and the  Hero King Coconut came out to play with the guests while I was cocooning!  I really appreciate them for stepping up and providing so much entertainment to the guests. Though they cheat with Limbo!  They are so small no one can beat them!

Woo Woo Fishy Coconut tried to organise a kart race.. kind of like Mario Kart. However there aren’t that many tiny motors for them to build karts out of. The Warrior King Coconut tried to quest for such motors .. but he found a cool looking skull and spend time trying to put it on the pommel of his sword.. something so tiny.. it must have been a tiny bird or maybe a fish skull or something.. Either way since the Warrior King doesn’t know anything about crafting gear like that.. it did not work out! Thank you everyone who has supported me this week or this month!

Do you maybe want to help them out in our next adventure!? Make a Kofi donation to get named once and get your own coconut avatar or become a Patreon to  be mentioned every week! Hero King Coconut approves! Of course he says some edgy stuff about “If you don’t ” but don’t worry about that! I am happy if people just interact with the blog as well! Of course money made will go to pursuing my dreams so King Coconut being the White mustachioed pal he is is rather adamant in this! Pro tip if he is bothering you.. his weakness is hills!

Pinkie Away from Keyboard

The 50% Real girl part of me is in heavy isolation, 1 February I have a super important hospital meeting and I can’t miss out on that.. I can’t be sick.. it’s one of these academic research types of hospitals that can improve my quality of life 100 fold ..but if I have to cancel the appointment on account of some sniffles I’ll probably have to postpone until the covid situation clears here. Since everything is under heavy lockdown here.. there isn’t much else to do then isolate either.  So I have been mostly playing games and on occasion cooking a little bit! I might host an online convention in the netherlands.. based on a user created content idea.  We are doing some market research on it now.  My friend is more positive on this idea than I am as I see a lot of technical limitations but who knows!

Kaijuman me has mostly been searching for budget friendly options to turn myself into a 2d model so I can do streaming content or YouTube content, I can pretty much draw my own emotions by now just the states between those emotions are complex and I can’t grasp rigging properly! I have also made a stream layout already and it is featured in the Zombie Land Saga review of this week! I even hit a lot of easter eggs in them to some of you guys out there!  I have enough coin on my blog paypal to afford a rigged model on Fiverr.. but I am afraid I might be delivered something of poor quality. If any of you have a good idea where to find a good rigger, let me know!  Other than that , to protect my real life self I have mostly been staying indoors and looking at lamps. Toy Stores are closed so I can’t even build lego cities for me to walk over and destroy! I tried that once and a lego got stuck under my foot! .. I would rather be hit by one of Godzilla’s Atomic Breath attacks than a Lego in my foot

Posts that Impressed Pinkie

Starting this year I will not be doing completely custom images anymore, and instead I am going to use avatars for link posts! This will really help me with time.. and the writers with their own brand so everyone wins! Click the avatar to visit some amazing posts!

I used to be a big Star Wars fan, and that love is still kind of there! It is hidden underneath a lot of negativity towards Disney though, to me that company has shown so much arrogance and that it is utterly unable to empathise with it’s audience that it just keeps doing what it does. With a few hits here and there! I do still love the Mandalorian.. but I always need to wait until a season finale has passed so I can binge shows because I do not want to support them for too long. I haven’t seen the Mandalorian season 2 yet, because I am waiting for WandaVision to have aired so I can binge both shows in one month! Wooderon’s series on the Clone Wars is a great proxy to get that good feeling, without supporting a company I feel is definitely on the Dark Side. 

While I do consume significantly less anime than most of you, I do love it still! I however am one that is fairly oblivious to the technical , and back end aspect of it.. the history of it all! Luckily Mari over at Starting Life from Zero has got me covered with this amazing post.. that has a lot of subsequent installments spanning across the week! A definite must read for any anime fan. Mari has great taste in anime as well. Although the latest recommendation from Marie, in Utena isn’t resonating with me too much. Five episodes in and I feel nothing,  I’ll try to struggle my way through but Utena might be a drop for me.  Perhaps I will keep watching it but just don’t review it on an episode basis who knows!  I totally did not recommend her post as a peace offering! (But I hope it helps) 

Celestial Sparkles is a great and creative blogger, who I have come to see as my Kohai of sorts!  I saw Cele took some inspiration from my visuals and I felt so proud! I really hope to see her do well, there is something really heartfelt about her! For her 2021 goal she hopes to achieve 50 followers and if you aren’t a follower I think you should really check out what she is about! She really loves Mecha anime, she has a very similar style in blog-tags to yours truly and she is doing her twelve days of anime challenge soon so for any anime fan there that doesn’t follow her yet. As well as all STAFF and everyone interested in one of the sweetest members in the community! Do follow this blog! Just check out how sweet she is!

For the last part I will post something everyone will already know most likely!  But the section is called Posts That Impressed Pinkie, not “Bloggers I’d like to Highlight’ .. because trust me.. this next one needs no shoutout from me! She is the biggest and one the most talked about Bloggers in the anime community! I am talking of course about the return of Karandi James of 100 Word Anime! Our Champion has returned! I was super excited about that! Great to see some good news in 2021! Welcome back Karandi , I look forward to see your blogs once more!

And that is it for this week’s update! I included my plans in earlier segments to keep everything a bit more focussed. My Own content,  Staff Content, Coconut Shout-outs , and other community members! I hope you will have an amazing new week! And keep chasing your dreams my little lights! Moth-Pinkie loves you all! Though maybe I do love lamps more!

The Paradise Weekly Gazette 4: 30 November to 6 December

The first month of Steampunk Month has already come and went by! While the animini’s did not change, the look of our website outside the reader certainly did! Let’s look back on this week and see what sorts of stuff we did and of course what is up next!  We will also discuss with you what is happening around the blogosphere!  So strap in for a ride through all our posts as we bring you our fourth ever Paradise Weekly Gazette.

The Animinis

We had an okay week of Anime this week, with a really strong Digimon episode, a super charming Natsume and a new show which I .. kinda liked in the form of Revolutionary Girl Utena. Not exactly new I know.. but a lot of you seem to really enjoy me watching classics and I lack a lot of them and I am having a lot of fun with them! Two shows I really like have entered “drop” quality for me though so let’s hope they pick up again soon! Luckily both are nearly finished as well!

Digimon Episode 13: Garudamon of the Crimson Wings

Samurai Flamenco Episode 20: Boy from the Past

That Time I got Reincarnated as a Slime Episode 19: Charybdis

Revolutionary Girl Utena Episode 1: The Rode Bride

Hikaru no Go Episode 24: Akira vs The Oza

Natsume Book of Friends Episode 4: Shigure and The Girl

Cowboy Bebop Episode 4: Gateway Shuffle

My favourite watch actually was Digimon, though Hikaru no Go came super close! I just liked the voice of Fanbeemon so much,  and the colours and everything in Digimon that it really struck a chord that I really needed this week! My least favourite view is probably Slime.. though Samurai Flamenco really annoyed me as well.. the last one mostly hurts because they had a really good ending already and this is kind of wrecking it!

Pinkie’s Other Post

Of course we also had to create some Steampunk posts .. after all it is Steampunk month! 
On monday it was still november though so I had to pay my respects to my Senpai first! After that we could move ahead full steam.. that pun sounded way to corny I am so sorry! Here is the other stuff I did this week!

I made Irina into a Pokémon.. and also determined what type of trainer she would be!

I determined how my life would be had we lived in a Steampunk society!

I watched a city attack a wall and get beaten by a usb drive plus a million things!

I gushed about how amazing my favourite Final Fantasy game is in a love letter!

I wrote this post! So if you want you can click here to go to this post!

Camp Coconut Updates

No Kofi donations this week for me so no stories to tell about the Coconuts either.. they might be hibernating and saving their money for christmas.. I have been playing around with the idea of creating a Patreon.. with a few fun tiers but I need better reward for lurking people who don’t like to socialise and Pokémon Battle.  So this is a work in progress. I might ask an audience with king Coconut to see what would be good tiers! Hail the Wise King Coconut!

You can sprout a Coconut based on you by supporting our Kofi once.. but supporting it regularly your Coconut will get into several adventures that will be mentioned here..and your Coconut might start to look a bit fancier.. though I still need to update the Shy Coconut’s art.. I have since chosen a design element I want to add!  However we might change things up a bit when Patreon comes around.. so keep following the news or assure yourself of a coconut!

Posts that Impressed Pinkie

Now that we move from November into December, a lot of posts are summaries of the past month.. I will not share those.. I want you to explore these blogs for yourself. I just wish to wet your appetites.

I always like to include one activating shout out! Where you can participate in something.. or where a blogger is being celebrated. This week Amelia is starting her A Girl and Her Anime Awards and while I have seen virtually nothing on her list to vote for and was to lazy to figure out if Digimon was a Summer of Fall Anime.. so I backed out of voting. I am an old lady after all I watch past stuff! But for all you seasonal watchers out there! Vote on her amazing list so we can find the best anime out there!  If I actually send you there .. vote for me for most influential blogger! That we all win…but mostly me! .. Uhm I mean Amelia!

Lyn really really enjoyed the Promised Neverland and he pretty much sold me on it as well! I already heard good things.. but this made me want to watch it more.. In fact I think I will replace Samurai Flamenco with it on my watch list whenever I am done with that. So I will probably pick this up soon! I do not  like his post .. as in press the button. That often but that is because I usually read his reviews after he tweets them out.. on my phone .. and I am not logged in on WordPress there! I am waaaay behind stuff so I don’t read episode summaries of shows I want to see.. but seeing people enjoy shows I don’t like.. also gives me pleasure!  Make sure to check out his reviews if you haven’t already!

Ospreyshire is such a good guy! He reviews movies and anime that tend to fly a bit under the radar so you might not have heard of him , I know my friends on the Scott-Jon Spencer front follow him but he always deserves more. I am a bit of a different kind of blogger but there is so much I can find in his posts I can respect.. but who better to explain what he is all about then the man himself. In this post he describes why he writes and it is amazing!

My blogging friend Joy is one of the most unique personalities you’ll ever see. She’s kind of like .. part Vulcan , part genius inventor, and a whole lot of programmer. Her ramblings on life are unique , spirited and playful! I do not consider myself a dumb person but when I read her quote Dante, when I see her tell her stories in her own way.. I feel dwarfed..and slightly attracted. I might be a Sapio-Romantic?  Who knows! Joy discusses the heavy team of our own mortality and its implications.. but she does so in a very Joy way. The topic is something I am  quite familiar with but her visions and her revelations at the end make for an interesting read for anyone. So do visit Joy .. and follow her blog.. she will be the president one day.. and remember a vote for Joy is a vote for love! So I assume a Like for Joy is like liking love as well!

Pinkie Away from Keyboard

I have had my ups and downs this week and the down is mostly been in my energy levels. I do have this a lot but the weather shifting to being super cold is flooring me and making my energy levels next to non existent. That also means I have done next to no exciting stuff! I am playing Dishonored for a Steampunk Review later this month.. and I am having an .. okay time with that so far. Not exactly my game .. but the setting is a lot of fun! I have also been feeling the call to return to Pokémon Shield again, do some shiny hunting and complete the dlc!  But that will probably be something for a bit later. I really want to get my shiny Wooloo though! It will be fun to let Whippy the Allcreamie get a Giantamax form as well.   Just so many games to play.

Other than that I have had a good talk with my psych.. he did a good job but it did not help my fatigue. I had a good but heavy talk and that took me out of wednesday and a migraine crippled me a bit on thursday which reduced my ability to work ahead. Mind you working ahead does mean writing four posts per day so that might be asking a bit much on days like those but yes unless I find lots of energy today I might not be able to make that guest post for Irina’s blog I tried to make this week! Oh well I will find a way to make everything work.

On Saturday the 5th of December the Dutch and the Belgian people celebrate a tradition called Sinterklaas. It’s about a Saint Nick that comes bearing gifts! The modern western Santa is a mix between our Sinterklaas and the British Father Christmas. Though both outdate the tradition of Santa. Saint Nicolas will stuff your shoes with a present if you have been good.. or a bunch of twigs for corporal punishment if you were bad.. though of course concerned moms abolished those twigs called “de roe” a few years ago. Nowadays more of the tradition is being scrutinized.. for just enough reasons but the country is going made and being divided. So to celebrate the tradition this year I am going to visit my mom, we exchange gifts and share a meal together.  No large gifts we will do that around christmas.. but just a nice little gesture. I will go out to do so right after scheduling this post so I can’t tell you what my gift just yet .. but if I am fit enough .. I might update this..probably not though.

Next wednesday I am going to Amsterdam for two days, spend some time in a hotel and do some important stuff while I am there as well, health stuff, but also take my time and enjoy a change of setting for a night. I might not be able to travel back so just making  so booked a place to stay just in case and will make the next day an enjoyable one. We are going to eat some Tapas at the hotel, with some drinks at the hotel bar.. a friend is coming along to drive me and for support. And we will go to the Vondelpark or zoo depending the next day to relax a bit! Depending on how crowded the city is!

 Plans

Depending on my energy levels I might skip a daytime post or two so I can relieve my workload a bit  and work ahead a bit more.. if I am good with energy however, I do plan to bring you my interpretation of a Pokémon Steampunk Game. I want to talk about a Steampunk anime movie, and watch another Steampunk movie as well! I also managed to beat the super hard game Steel Empire for Americans.. but Empire of Steel for us Europeans so you can expect a review for that to drop soon as well!


Regardless of my energy levels the animini’s will at least keep coming! So that is seven posts of anime already! … As long as I don’t get murdered in Amsterdam at least! Who knows! Regardless on what happens I plan to make the next week a great one! And I hope you will do so to! Let me know how your week has been in the comments and onto the next! 2021 is drawing closer!