-Disclaimer: Princess Pinkie is a persona made for entertainment purposes, any feelings she holds towards other people do not reflect my true feelings-
Well now that this website it’s finally fit for a princess it is about time someone with taste took over these top 5’s. I am Princess Pinkie and in the banner you see my court jester. Iamwright is a shiny aipom. In Princess Pinkie’s Picks, I rank , rate evaluated and berate. A woman of my tastes deserves to be number this job. As my first job I will look at the plebeians and their silly mistakes. It feels me with joy that I am able to tell you how wrong you are, I might even make you a slightly better trainer! Not as great as me of course… but it is nice to help you poor lost souls
Mistake Number 5: Getting a full team early game
Though not applicable to a few fan games like the excellent Pokémon Reborn in the original series you might not wanna catch them all straight from the start. So many poor dumb souls started Gen 1 with Charmander, then caught Pidgey and Rattata, added a Nidoran to their team as well, just to pick up a bug in Viridian forest. Of course you want to level them all equally and when you reach the first gym you notice that guy is super high level. Squinty Mc Squint face whoops your ParASS and you are back at Joy’s place, the pokémon center. Though not impossible it makes for a tedious game of grinding. Especially when you are still learning the ropes it can make the game feel way less fluent that it needs to be. This goes for basically every generation of games. Though it can be great fun to make a team of early game Pokémon, they do need a little more love and understanding so it’s best not to fill up on Pokémon to early. Trying to complete your pokédex as you go by training everything you find up right away can be disheartening and to be honest a bit dull. It won’t even result into good pokémon due to how effort values work. Training against random pokémon results in random stat boosts, which is not the greatest thing in the world. For a normal playthrough of a new game I tend to start out with a team of two for the first gym and store the rest of what I caught. Then for each following gym I add a new team member. Of course I am a princess and therefore also a brilliant mind but I can tell you that by leveling this way you are in for a nice ride, where things are neither hard nor ridiculously easy. It means you actually can grow to appreciate your team members and be much more invested in getting their movesets right.You don’t have that many others to fallback on yet you also do not have to grind for hours. A nice variation for the earlier games is not picking adding an actual teammate after the second gym but adding a hm slave instead. Which brings me to my next subject.
Mistake Number 4: HM Crippled Team members.
Did you pick the water starter in each region? Well at least up to Alola. Chances are you are the scum that made the mistake I am talking about next. Ruining perfectly good pokémon with HM’s. The abbreviation stands for Hidden Machine and these are pokémon to not only use a move inside battle, they can use it to interact with the world as well. Cutting down trees, illuminating dark caves , moving rocks and cruising around on the ocean are but some of the possibilities. However here is a thing you might not know… quite a few of these moves are completely outclassed by regular moves. Surf is good in double battles but blown out of the water by Hydro Pump, Cut is truly horrible as a move and Strength while passable can’t hold a candle to a maxed out Return or Frustration. Though dropping accuracy isn’t a bad idea.. flash is not the ideal way to go. You can’t overwrite HM’s. So if your Blastoise suddenly learns Hydro Cannon while knowing Surf, Flash, Waterfall and Strength you can not get that sweet sweet move. Your Pokémon , thanks to your lack of insight is now doomed to a life of mediocrity. Of course you can totally reverse it, all you have to do is visit the move deleter to delete a HM, then if you want it to relearn a move it just wanted to learn you will have to go catch a luvdisc which usually only appears on a single route in the game. Then it has a 50% chance to hold an item called a heart scale, which you will have to trade in to relearn a single move. Those who managed to slap to many hidden machines onto their pokémon in the first generation were really far from home, with no move deleter in the entire game those pokemon were forever ruined.For this very reason the concept of a HM-Slave was introduced. This is a pokémon you take along just so it can learn the weaker machines so that those moves don’t hinder your team. Bidoof is by reputation the perfect slave.So when you distribute the moves that allow you to progress to the world try to stay clear of teaching your main team to many of them..it can really bring down your battle capabilities. Hidden Machines, named Secret Machines have been a necessary evil throughout generations 1 till 6 that have luckily since have vanished for better alternatives. So for those playing the newer games, you can’t make that mistake anymore. Wait if we in the west used the terminology used in Japan.. would that have meant Bidoof was the perfect SM-slave?
Mistake Number 3: Capturing something stupid with your masterball
The Masterball is the holy grail of the pokemon world, a ball fit for a princess like me. A sleek purple design with some pink dots give it an air of finesse and refinement. Had those colours been inverted it might as well have a P on it instead of an M because it would have been totally made for Pinkie. Yet some of you do not appreciate it’s true power! This capturing tool, has the power of being able to catch any pokémon without fail. That means you should really reserve it for that legendary like mewtwo or zy-…. ‘omg it’s a PIKACHU’ *throws masterball*. I saw my sister make this mistake, to this day i still shiver at the weak mindedness and the buffoonery that shares the same blood with your highness Princess Pinkie! I however hold no doubt that if my kin is able to make this mistake you as my reader can and no doubt will have as well. How many Mewtwo’s or Arceus will have gotten away because people are unable to read or grasp a simple concept is unknown. As a flawless being and never having made this mistake myself I will never understand your struggles, but know that I do pity you. To give myself an extra challenge I have taken on legendaries without this wonderful item as well, it can be an arduous endeavor if you do not fully know how capturing works. Should you not capture changes are only increased or decreased based on a pokémom being in red, yellow or green health.. alongside the question if they are statussed or not one might go over zealous and accidentally faint the legendary, which let’s face it.. basically equals flat out killing it off. So use that grey matter before using your masterball.
Mistake Number 2: Giving your rival a dumb name.
Even as a kid, I wasn’t that infantile. One of my biggest pet peeves when watching let’s plays..is the inadolencent names people tend to give their rival. Though it seems like fun at first it can really ruin the tension of the later rival battles if DOUCHE suddenly shows up to challenge you. For those who just smiled at the idea.. imagine me staring disapprovingly at you. Your rival is really important in these games. He or she contributes to your story and development as a trainer. How cool is it to be challenged by Champion Gary ‘Mother Playing-Together’ Oak. Your Rival and someone you gained respect for along the way. Now imagine that same battle for the title but against ‘IC WIENER’ It lacks the same emotion, it can make your journey seem so much more flat and since it’s oftenly one of the last battles of the main game… it can really end on a low. Imagine that battle against Wally at the end of Victory Road at ORAS, that epic theme beginning to play,, you know you have helped Wally capture his first pokémon.. you are his senpai,,who is stronger the master or the student .. the clash of the ages! You see him posing, for the first time with a confident look on his face.
Then your text prompt appears ‘Asthma Boy’ wants to battle. All the tension and build up .. all the development gone.. because you tried to be funny! The first time you battle you might find it funny, good for you but poor humanity if you still like the joke at your second encounter. At one point there WILL come a moment where you regret what you did to your game. You know there is no way back..and your rival is now forever ruined.. something eats and your heart as you enjoy the game less. Who is the douche now?!
Mistake number 1: Not knowing what a glitched pokemon is.
We have all tried it… even I am guilty of this one..I figured my game would obey it’s princess!. We talked to the old man in Viridian city then flew to the cinnabar islands and surfed along the east coast to encounter the fabled Missingno! Maybe you even egg-glitched Celebi into existence. You could encounter Deccamark in Hoenn. Pokémon games are so filled with glitches it can feel like Todd Howard made them. It’s fun to play around with them, however while encountering a glitched Pokémon, there is one important rule you need to adhere to. Do NOT capture it. These Pokémons ruin and corrupt your game into a broken mess. I indeed have captured the scrapped-data pokémon from generation. I even evolved it into a Kangaskhan knowing wing attack and water fun by giving it a rare candy! I valiantly used it to try Mew’s truck to no avail. Suddenly my box system began to loop infinitely. My game would crash or friends in my box would vanish. Catching a glitched pokemon is a very bad idea. It breaks your game and can ruin everything you have come to know and love.
This mistake makes it to the number one spot because it’s easy to do and can actually break your game where the others will just kill your enjoyment.
However I did not name this mistake ‘catching a glitched pokemon’ but making it about not being able to identify that one. The reason for that is because some people reset their game when a pokemon is not the right colour. They think their game is glitched turn of their system and erase that extreme rare shiny they encounter off the face of the pokemon world. These people….Some people who want shinies have never encountered one in their lives. The resetters, somehow so a perfectly working pokémon, a nice sparkly effect and still think… well that’s bad lets reset. That’s not how these games work.. it can not randomly hueshift! Arceus who art in heavens have mercy on them. Even krill has more active brain cells. Resetting a shiny on accident happens, especially if you are soft resetting a lot and get into that flow, it is a possibility Thinking a shiny is a glitch .. almost feels like tossing away a lottery tickets worth a thousand bucks..just because you did not win the million.
How many of these mistakes did you make when you just started? Do you have another Pokémon mistake? Let me know in the comments!
Remember I am not weird! Just really pink!
Until we read again!